You know you’re from California if:

1. Your coworker has 8 body piercings and none are visible.

1.  You make over $300,000 and still can’t afford a house.

1.  You take a bus and are shocked  at two people carrying on a conversation in English.

1. Your child’s 3rd-grade  teacher has purple hair, a nose ring, and is named  Flower.

1. You can’t remember .. .is  pot illegal?

1.  You’ve been to a baby shower  that  has two mothers and a sperm donor.

1.  You have a very strong opinion about where your coffee beans  are grown,
   and you can taste the difference between  Sumatran and Ethiopian.

1.  You can’t remember … is pot illegal?

1.  A really great parking space can totally move you to tears.

1.  Gas costs $1.00 per gallon more  than anywhere else in the  U.S.

1. Unlike back home, the guy at 8:30am at Starbucks wearing a  baseball cap and
   sunglasses who looks like George Clooney…… really IS George Clooney.

1.  Your car insurance costs as much as your house payment.

1.  You can’t remember …is pot  illegal?

1.  It’s barely sprinkling rain and there’s a report on every news station:  “STORM WATCH.”

1.  You pass an elementary school  playground and the children are all busy  with their cells or pagers.

1.  Or It’s barely sprinkling  rain outside, so you leave for work an hour early to avoid all the weather-related accidents.

1. HEY!!!! Is pot illegal????

1.  Both you AND your dog have therapists, psychics, personal trainers  and cosmetic surgeons.

1.  The Terminator was your governor.

If you drive illegally, they take your driver’s license. If you’re here illegally, they want to give you one.