I was gonna post about the SOTU, but I got so depressed I changed my mind…
(I ‘know’ I’m gonna catch hell for this one… )
WHY MEN ARE NEVER DEPRESSED:
Men Are Just Happier People– What do you expect from such simple creatures?
Your last name stays put.
The garage is all yours.
Wedding plans take care of themselves.
Chocolate is just another snack.
You can be Prime Minister.
You can never be pregnant.
You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park. You can wear NO shirt to a water park.
Car mechanics tell you the truth.
The world is your urinal.
You never have to drive to another petrol station restroom because this one is just too icky.
You don’t have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.
Same work, more pay. (sorry bout that)
Wrinkles add character.
Wedding dress500+. Tux rental-50.
People never stare at your chest when you’re talking to them.
New shoes don’t cut, blister, or mangle your feet.
One mood all the time.
Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.
You know stuff about tanks..
A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.
You can open all your own jars.
You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.
If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend.
Your underwear is 5.95 for a three-pack.
You almost never have strap problems in public.
You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.
Everything on your face stays its original color.
The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.
You only have to shave your face and neck.
You can play with toys all your life.
One wallet and one pair of shoes — one colour for all seasons.
You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look.
You can ‘do’ your nails with a pocket knife.
You have freedom of choice concerning growing a moustache.
You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24th in 25 minutes.
Getting out of town, are we? Do I need to call someone if you’re this suicidal?
Your feeling pretty BRAVE today arent you? I know a few of those are wrong.
I stare at men’s chests when they talk…
LATWTTB (laughing all the way to the bank)
DB- Yep, I figure by the time anybody can get here, I’ll be overseas 🙂
SS- Yeah, but still funny 🙂
Snigs- ah…er… nevermind!
Brighid- Figures 🙂
Perhaps this will help. According to women, men have two faults. Everything we say and everything we do. Therefore, since we are going to be dirty bitched no matter what, we do what ever we want.
🙂
As my happy face shows, we are easily amused.
Josh
I think you pretty much nailed it! The blowback may be severe from this missive however!
Don’t worry, I posted on B.’s Blog that the computers fly the planes anyway now with minimal input from the “meatsacks” up front. I think she forgave me or is ranging me with a rangefinder now!
Now that I said that here, you are probably doing the same!
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In the beginning God created man,then he rested.Then God created woman.Since then nobody rested.
Had to correct the oops in spelling.
WSF- Agreed! 🙁
Josh- That we are!
Keads- I’m running before they catch me…LOL
Fuzzy- you’re right about that one too!
“You don’t have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.”
This is because you know how to drill and tap a hole to a larger size.
ASM- You’ve got that right 🙂
We most certainly are!
And Snigs is at it again.
Your feeling pretty BRAVE today arent you? I know a few of those are wrong. 2945abc45 0223