Since I’m still on meds from the surgery, got these from the mil e-mail string…

HOW TO BE POLITICALLY CORRECT WITH WOMEN IN THE MODERN WORLD

She is not a BLEACHED BLONDE she is PEROXIDE DEPENDENT

She is not a BAD COOK she is MICROWAVE COMPATIBLE

She does not wear TOO MUCH JEWELRY she is METALLICALLY OVERBURDENED

She is not CONCEITED she is INTIMATELY AWARE OF HER BEST QUALITIES

She does not GAIN WEIGHT she is a METABOLIC UNDERACHIEVER

She does not TEASE or FLIRT she engages in ARTIFICIAL STIMULATION

She is not DUMB she is a DETOUR OFF THE INFORMATION SUPERHIGHWAY

She is not TOO SKINNY she is SKELETALLY PROMINENT

She does not HAVE A MUSTACHE she is IN TOUCH WITH HER MASCULINE SIDE

She does not HATE TELEVISED SPORTS she is ATHLETICALLY IGNORANT

She has not BEEN AROUND she is a PREVIOUSLY ENJOYED COMPANION

She does not WEAR TOO MUCH PERFUME she commits FRAGRANCE ABUSE

She does not GO SHOPPING she is MALL FLUENT

She is not an AIR HEAD she is REALITY IMPAIRED

She does not get DRUNK or TIPSY she gets CHEMICALLY INCONVENIENCED

She does not get FAT or CHUBBY she achieves MAXIMUM DENSITY

She is not COLD or FRIGID she is THERMALLY INACCESSIBLE

She does not WEAR TOO MUCH MAKEUP she has reached COSMETIC SATURATION

She does not NAG YOU she becomes VERBALLY REPETITIVE

She does not want to be MARRIED she wants to lock you in DOMESTIC INCARCERATION

Hopefully coherent blogging (if I ever did) will resume sometime this week… LOL