I got nuttin…

Trying to play with formatting for the book… I can’t brain now, so you get humor…

Tax cut explained- This is indeed a very exciting prospect.  I’ll explain it by using a Q & A format:

Q. What is a ‘Tax Cut’ ?

A. It is extra money that the federal government will return to taxpayers when they file their “1040 Tax Returns”.

Q.Where will the government get this money that they are going to return?

A. From taxpayers.

Q. So the government is giving me back my own money?

A. Only a smidgen of it, a couple of thousand dollars.

Q. What is the purpose of this tax cut?

A The plan is for you to use the money to purchase an ultra high-definition TV set, thus stimulating the economy.

Q. But isn’t that stimulating the economy of China?

A. Shut up.

Below is some helpful advice on how to best help the U.S. Economy by spending your “tax cut returns” wisely:

* If you spend the “tax cut returns” money at Wal-Mart, the money will  ; go to China or Sri Lanka .

* If you spend it on gasoline, your money will go to the Arabs.

* If you purchase a computer, it will go to India (software), China (hardware) …

* If you purchase fruit and vegetables, it will go to Mexico, Honduras or Guatemala …

* If you buy an efficient car, it will go to Japan or Korea.

* If you purchase useless stuff, it will go to Taiwan.

* If you pay your credit cards off, or buy stock, it will go to banking management bonuses and they will hide it offshore.

Instead, keep the money in America by: 1) Spending it at yard sales, or 2) Going to ball games, or 3) Spending it on prostitutes, or 4) Beer or 5) Tattoos.

(These are the only American businesses still operating in the U.S. )

Conclusion: Go to a ball game with a tattooed prostitute that you met at a yard sale and drink beer all day! No need to thank me, I’m just glad I could be of help.

There there are cartoons…



I got nuttin… — 12 Comments

  1. Well…I prefer whiskey over beer, am afraid of needles, not much on professional ball games, don’t want to get up at 3 am so yard sales are out, therefore,…I’m getting two prostitutes at a time to more quickly help America!
    What a great idea! Thanks Jim!!

  2. You forgot guns – the vast majority of the firearms and accessories we see are made in the US for legal reasons. otherwise I’m sure that industry would have left too!

    • Yes! more guns. Beer money, by the way often goes to Holland or Canada (Coors, Budweiser, and Miller are owned by foreign companies).

  3. Not just guns! Do not forget the ammo. Then, shoot it and buy more. Most Ammo is US made and US owned.

    • Yep – you can never have too much ammo – well unless you are on fire or in deep water! 😉

  4. I’ve already earmarked my tax return for a 700LR in .300 Win Mag and Loopy glass. ‘Muricah!

    • Skip – one of the few ‘perks’ to being disability retired from the military is that I don’t pay federal income tax so no refund – of course they still ‘get me’ for property taxes, gasoline taxes etc etc.

  5. Until recently, the good beer (YMMV) was imported.
    Now rye… well I suppose there is some Canadian stuff, but rye is rather domestic.