Well done!!!

The Pulaski County Sheriff’s Office in the southwest corner of Virginia, put this out to ‘update’ the folks on the new laws… They DO have a university there, Radford, and are just down the road from VPI in Blacksburg.

Happy 420 Day to all you Blazers, Smokers, Jokers, and Midnight Tokers! Marijuana laws in Virginia can be described as the old saying goes, “the times, they are a changing,” and starting July 1st, 2021, much will be changed. Please please please do your own research concerning the use, possession, and cultivation of the devil’s lettuce. And by research, I don’t mean asking your uncle Ricky after he has just tapped out a 3 foot tower bong and he is covered in Doritos dust. That would be like going to a gentleman’s club and believing every dancer that says you are their favorite! If you choose to partake in the happy herb, it is your responsibility to know and understand all the laws and the specific dates as they pertain to it.
Now I’m not telling anyone to do this, but if you decide to fire up a big ol’ fattie once the magical date gets here, PCSO would like you to please keep a few things in mind:
• Driving impaired is driving impaired. It doesn’t matter if you are under the influence of firewater or Juanita’s wonders, you can not cruise around in an old Volkswagen van laying down a smoke screen with fifty eleven of your friends inside trying to see who can laugh the longest at the shopping cart that somebody put big googley eyes on.
• Public use of the green goblin is still a no go. Please don’t think it’s a good idea to torch up a handful of giggle weed in the middle of Sunday School, because it’s not. Even if public consumption wasn’t against the law, you would still need to worry about the church lady who carries a big wooden spoon in her pocketbook for occasions such as this.
• Please remember that the law for cultivation of puffer plants allows 4 PLANTS PER HOUSEHOLD. You can’t pretend you’re living up the holler down Copperhead Road and have the back 40 acres sprouting stalks like you’re Johnny Appleseed.
• Please be sure to know exactly where your property lines are if you decide to plant your very own Aunt Mary seeds. If you have to ask why this is essential……….please don’t grow your own.
• Also, and this is very important, be careful as to which product you consume, because not everyone has your best interest at heart. There are many different types of marijuana out there and it can be laced with everything from methamphetamine to angel dust, and these my friends, can and will kill you. Please know the signs of what an overdose looks like and call 911 immediately if someone needs help.
And before anyone gets all fired up thinking that PCSO is promoting the use of the righteous bush, we ain’t. We’re just trying our best to keep our community safe and informed. If a person decides to wake and bake legally while they are blasting Hitch a Ride by Boston without disturbing their neighbors, that’s like totally their choice dude. We just want everyone to be safe and go home to their families and dogs. And unicorns. And cats. And fish. And lizards. And stamp collections. And Dale Earnhardt memorabilia.
Call your mom.
Well done to the SO! Humor and facts, and some references only the old farts will get… LOL


Well done!!! — 22 Comments

  1. Good for the SO, and for the Commonwealth of Virginia, BUT:
    Pot is STILL against federal law, and is cause to have your application for a firearm (Form 4473) kicked out.
    And federal law STILL prevents research into the medical uses of pot, AND of other cannabis chemicals, such as CBD & CBC oil, etc. According to the local (Georgia legal) purveyor of hemp products, the ONLY place that is generating ANY research is Israel, and they really don’t have the massive support system needed to properly assign a grillion Ph.D. students to dissertate so their faculty advisers can publish and get paid.
    As an interested party (due to chronic pain) in the CBD issue, I hope one thing leads to then next pretty doggone quickly. I’ve cut my opioid use by 50% by vaping CBD over the past two years, but that’s just being lucky, as NO ONE is legally able to say, “this blend works best for ______” (pain, anxiety, depression, hair loss, the heartbreak of psoriasis, whatever).
    But Virginia is right next to DC, so maybe the VA tokers will provide influence on the Goobermint.
    But in the meantime, kids, stay in school, stay out of pool halls and discos, and remember: when the heartbreak of psoriasis is outlawed, only outlaws will have the heartbreak of psoriasis!

  2. And if you say you don’t use and then later it is discovered that you do use, you can be prosecuted for lying on your form. That is why Hunter Biden is in federal jail. Oh, wait. OK, but it still applies if you aren’t the scion of a federally connected crime family.

    I’d also point out (as a fan of legalization) that it isn’t nearly as harmless as made out. There is a significant link between marijuana use and worsening schizophrenia. Concerning to me that it is becoming casual and no one talks about the potential negative effects in the long term.

    • Yup, I’m one of that group who cannot tolerate THC. It really mucks up my head.
      And, like you, I favor legalization, which will lead to regulation, taxation, and RESEARCH.

      • It is not going to lead to useful research.

        The politicians pushing legalization already know what they want to know.

        It is like supposing that if these same politicians put ‘research’ dollars into AGW or gun control studies, all of a sudden that ‘research’ stops being nothing other than propaganda.

        To my knowledge, the people telling you that research is illegal are ignoring the stuff done under the NIH, I would guess because it doesn’t produce the answers they want.

        Congress and the PRC are major funders of the US university system. Congress and the PRC are both up to no good, and do not have the best interests of Americans at heart. The only reason to trust anything out of a university is if a) you are doing all of the work yourself /AND/ b) you have reason to think you are competent to do all of that work. If the topic is genuine research, you have cause to think that b is not true.

        To suppose that, after saying the politically useful things about AGW, the politically useful things about race, the politically useful things about gun control, the politically useful things about sexual preference and sex identity, and the politically useful things about last winter’s common cold, that the American university would decline to say the politically useful things about marijuana if lavishly funded is ludicrous.

        I understand that you may not have been copied on the emails from your local universities that confirm precisely how untrustworthy they are. If you do not have your ear to the ground about how problematic these institutions are, it is really easy to suppose that they are still as sound as when you were last really close to them.

        I may be kicking up more of a fuss on this because of yesterday learning about the Linux kernel kicking off U Minn because of their IRB signing off on unethical research involving deliberately submitting useless or harmful patches. CS researchers, so you can’t just safely ignore the sociologists, psychologists, climate scientists, etc.

        It is possible that I am just doing my close following through a particularly unethical institution, which has very clearly signaled both that free speech will not be permitted, and that it prefers certain philosophical positions. That may simply only reflect badly on me. (The known apolitical ethical issues in that place make it sorta like trying to get hired by the Federal government right now, despite being informed about the illegality of Biden’s election, and about his issues with financial fraud and sexual misconduct. Someone doing that may well have a strong non-corrupt motivation, that can only be pursued by working for the Federal government. But even so, it raises the question of whether said someone can be persuaded to overlook corrupt things through that motivation.)

    • In fairness, the sources I have been reading on it so far are probably biased in favor of the Linux organization.

      Linux organization does business on a mailing list, which is archived, and accessible via a website that was cited in some of the articles.

      In the emails I read, dated the 20th, 21st, and 22nd, the linux people seem to think that they had been attempting to work the issue more gently with the university, and not gotten any traction.

      The decision to ban U Minn addresses, and try to pull all the code submitted through problem addresses was apparently the 21st or 22nd. IIRC.

      You are definitely more careful and tactful in your speech than I manage to be.

      Perhaps my reaction here is just having a hysterical personality, or something.

  3. They legalized it here in Michigan.
    Because it was on the ballot, they got a lot of other stupid stuff in, particularly our resident tyrant.
    Now the majority of billboards are for pot shops and delivery services it seems.

  4. I useta live in O-ree-gon, and I get back there from time to time, and the WEED boys have a bunch of stores in my previous town. I don’t DOOOOOO that stuff.

  5. All- Good points. And you can ask Colorado how it’s going… Homelessness is up, grifters/panhandlers are everywhere, and the ‘illegal’ drugs are still there because they are cheaper.

    • Canada, where according to several bloggers, the official government weed is lower quality and more expensive – and in shorter supply! – than your local Mike Juliet distributor in the alley behind the totally-not-a-head-shop place next door to the snack-food emporium.

    • Yeah, but are those homeless drawn from other parts of the country, or an actual over all increase? If it is only redistribution, than late ‘legalizing’ states will have a lower increase.

  6. An amazing sense of humor for Pulaski LEO. Well done! Back in the day it was 0.0 percent. It’s a mean, ugly town now. It has always been so.

  7. TXRed- Yep, same in Colorado and California (cheaper anyway)

    Bob- Overall increase. Dopers/homeless=more crime

    Keads- Thanks for the heads up!

  8. Very nicely done, combining humor and actual relevant information in a way that doesn’t sound (entirely) like The Man overtrying to be cool.
    The Boston bit did make me chuckle: “..without disturbing their neighbors..”! Ha!
    And a nice Steve Earl reference! Saw him in ‘88 with Dylan. (No, don’t remember too much of that show…)

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