Those of you in the south will understand, and those of you who are not… too bad.
Southern women know their summer weather report: Humidity,Humidity,Humidity and HOT!
Southern women know their vacation spots: The beach, The rivuh, The crick
Southern women know everybody’s first name:Honey,D arlin,’Shugah
Southern women know the movies that speak to their hearts:Fried Green Tomatoes, Driving Miss Daisy, Steel Magnolias, Gone With The Wind
Southern women know their religions: Baptist, Methodist, Football
Southern women know their cities dripping with Southern charm:Chawl’stn, S’vanah, Foat Wuth, N’awlins, Addlanna
Southern women know their elegant gentlemen: Men in uniform, Men in tuxedos, Rhett Butler
Southern girls know their prime real estate:The Mall, The Spa, The Beauty Salon
Southern girls know the 3 deadly sins: Having bad hair and nails, Having bad manners, Cooking bad food
More Suthen-ism’s: Only a Southerner knows the difference between a hissie fit and a conniption fit, and that you don’t “HAVE” them, you “PITCH” them.
Only a Southerner knows how many fish, collard greens, turnip greens, peas, beans, etc., make up “a mess.”
Only a Southerner can show or point out to you the general direction of “yonder.”
Only a Southerner knows exactly how long “directly” is, as in:
“Going to town, be back drekly (directly).”
Even Southern babies know that “Gimme some sugar” is not a request for the white, granular, sweet substance that sits in a pretty little bowl in the middle of the table.
All Southerners know exactly when “by and by” is. They might not use the term, but they know the concept well.
Only a Southerner knows instinctively that the best gesture of solace for a neighbor who’s got trouble is a plate of hot fried chicken and a big bowl of cold potato salad.
If the neighbor’s trouble is a real crisis, they also know to add a large banana puddin’!
Only Southerners grow up knowing the difference between “right near” and
“a right far piece.” They also know that “just down the road” can be 1 mile or 20.
Only a Southerner both knows and understands the difference between a redneck, a good ol’ boy, and po’ white trash.
No true Southerner would ever assume that the car with the flashing turn signal is actually going to make a turn.
A Southerner knows that “fixin” can be used as a noun, a verb, or an adverb.
Only Southerners make friends while standing in lines… and when we’re “in line,”… we talk to everybody!
Put 100 Southerners in a room and half of them will discover they’re related, even if only by marriage.
In the South, y’all is singular, all y’all is plural.
Southerners know grits come from corn and how to eat them.
Every Southerner knows tomatoes with eggs, bacon, grits, and coffee are perfectly wonderful; that red eye gravy is also a breakfast food; and that fried green tomatoes are not a breakfast food.
When you hear someone say, “Well, I caught myself lookin’,” you know you are in the presence of a genuine Southerner!
Only true Southerners say “sweet tea” and “sweet milk.” Sweet tea indicates the need for sugar and lots of it — we do not like our tea unsweetened. “Sweet milk” means you don’t want buttermilk.
And a true Southerner knows you don’t scream obscenities at little old ladies who drive 30 MPH on the freeway. You just say,”Bless her heart”… and go your own way.
To those of you who are still a little embarrassed by your Southerness: Take two tent revivals and a dose of sausage gravy and call me in the morning. Bless your heart!
Now y’all have a good weekend, ya hear!!!
Lol…. I know every one of them folks!
Dayyuuum, that is funny!!!!
have a great weekend yourself!
Remember, southern women don’t sweat, we glisten.
Brings lots of memories to this ol’ Georgian heart of mine.
Bob Perrow
Remember all iced tea is sweet too here!
Gosh, never realized I had that much of the south buried in me ! 😀
Maybe that’s why my relatives north of 36d 30m look at me funny.
Skul
You forgot, Southern women don’t sweat, we glisten (and we stick by that statement even when we’re dripping wet).
I went to my favorite greasy spoon, “the cabin,” for lunch yesterday. When I entered, the waitress hollered, “Hey Mike! 14?” I nodded and she brought out two biscuits ‘n gravy, two sausage patties and a scrambled egg and coffee.
Missouri may not be in the South, but our culture is.
Dear Lord, you’ve taken me home, back down South to my place I was raised – about 40 miles south of Augusta,Georgia. Nothing but cotton fields and bird dogs.
I can near half my Aunts and Uncles who talk just like that,and including my sister.
Very nice, in case I was wandering or wondering.
This explains a lot. Kentucky may not be the deep South, but it’s south enough for most of this to work here.
Now shugah, nobody says swee’ tea no more, ’cause everybody knows the only real tea is sweet. Anybody asks for unsweetened tea & we just know right off they ain’t from ’round here, but that’s alright I reckon, guessin’ God can’t shine on everybody.
Now, I’m fixin’ to go have me a lil’ ol’ glass uh Coke (really it’s Mello Yello, but everything carbonated is Coke ’round here), ’cause I’ve done glistened ’til I’m ’bout near parched.
Y’all have a good day now, ya hear?
Damn, I’m from Southern Rhode Island and I heard a good part of those growin’ up here and we are all dyed in the wool Swamp Yankees!!
Best part of traveling in the South are the ladies. If my ex had called me “darling”,”handsome”, and “sugar” half as much as the ladies behind the counters and menus I might still be married.
Snigs does it so very well!
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SO TRUE
And only in the South is “Well, he NEEDED killin’ “ a perfectly acceptable defense.
And Southern women often display their displeasure with the men in their lives by beating his favorite shotgun to pieces against the side of his new pickup.
Supi and Kristin – –
Re: Women don’t sweat, hey glisten. Somehow, I’d missed that phrasing. What I always heard was, “Horses sweat, men perspire, but ladies glow.
JPG
🙂 Glad y’all enjoyed those!
And one of our favourite bloggers is one of those Wunnerful Suthern Wimmen! And we do so enjoy her company!
ORPO- Excellent point 🙂
One of the things I love about Alaska: the oils brings so many Okies, Texans, ‘Bamans and Louisianans (Cajun, Creole, and good ol’ redneck varieties) that a good chunk of that rings true up here, too.
Now you’ve got me hankerin’ to swing by one of the diners and get some sausage gravy n’ biscuits with some fried okra.
I thought sweet tea was “sway tay”. I know “whenever” (not “when”) is always used to describe an event. “It was rainin’ whenever I graduated high school.” Or “We went shopping whenever she picked me up.”
Thanks for sharing, NFO
Love
Granny
Wing- Yep, plenty of Southern cookin in Alaska, especially around Fairbanks!
Granny- Thank you!