I think part of a best friend’s job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die. Yep…
Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you’re wrong.Â
Ah yes, the DOH moment…I totally take back all those times I didn’t want to nap when I was younger.
There is great need for a sarcasm font.
How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?Â
Wad the sumbitch up and throw it in the BACK of the drawer…Was learning cursive really necessary?
Map Quest really needs to start their directions on # 5. I’m pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.Â
It’s even MORE interesting when it’s not the route you actually take (when there is ONLY one actual exit).Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died. Or not, depends on your level of paranoia…
I can’t remember the last time I wasn’t at least kind of tired.
Bad decisions make good stories.Â
But ONLY if you survive…You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you know that you just aren’t going to do anything productive for the rest of the day.Â
Usually about 0830.Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after Blu Ray? I don’t want to have to restart my collection…again.Â
Not gonna, hell I never bought Blu Ray…I’m always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten-page technical report that I swear I did not make any changes to.Â
Still better than Word Perfect!I keep some people’s phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.Â
Yep, I ‘know’ a few folks are doing that… LOLI think the freezer deserves a light as well.Â
Never thought about that one…I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or Saturday night more kisses begin with Miller Lite than Kay.Â
Oh yeah, they ‘might’ end up at Kay’s but they didn’t “start” there…I wish Google Maps had an “Avoid Ghetto” routing option.Â
Yep…I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.Â
Boredom wins 3 out of 5!How many times is it appropriate to say “What?” before you just nod and smile because you still didn’t hear or understand a word they said?Â
Eh???I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars team up to prevent a jerk from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers and sisters!Â
Even better when you get two Semis that are pissed at the traffic and block BOTH lanes! 🙂Shirts get dirty. Underwear gets dirty. Pants? Pants never get dirty, and you can wear them forever.Â
Or until the stain becomes so obvious even YOU notice it…Sometimes I’ll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not know what time it is.Â
That means it’s time to change the battery!Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car keys in a pocket, finding their cell phone, and Pinning the Tail on the Donkey – but I’d bet everyone can find and push the snooze button from 3 feet away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time, every time!Â
I can do it from 7 feet… 🙂The first testicular guard, the “Cup,” was used in Hockey in 1874 and the first helmet was used in 1974.That means it only took 100 years for men to realize that their brain is also important.Â
It’s hockey, what do you expect… sigh…
“Bad decisions make good stories”
That one was written just for me.
Agree on the “avoid ghetto” Google Maps feature. It’d be useful on hotel websites, as well. Just sayin’.
Good judgment comes from bad experience.
Bad experience comes from bad judgment.
Bad judgment comes from ignoring good advice.
Good advice comes from good judgment.
“Avoid Ghetto” option when you need to reroute to avoid traffic. Hint. Don’t use it in Birmingham, AL.
Oh, that last one gets a belly laugh!
On the last one:
(Homer Simpson) Alright Brain, you don’t like me, and I don’t like you. But lets just do this, and I can get back to killing you with beer.
If MapQuest didn’t post Directions 1-4, then invariably they would have to post this:
“This direction set has failed. You can’t get there from here. Your starting point must begin somewhere else.”
Another version: good judgment comes from bad experience. Bad experience comes from poor judgment.
All true, your sayings are. [/Yoda]
All, thanks and agree!
Posted from my iPhone.
I live on “Bad things make good stories” I constantly tell my family…this is gonna make a good story someday.
I think my favorite is either the obituaries or the phone … but all made me giggle! Hope your trip is going well enough to be enjoyable and enough goofiness to bring us all back some stories! Be safe!
Agirl- Yep, but ONLY if you survive… Remember THAT part!
Joey- It’s going…. Mostly downhill… Sigh
Wow, Old NFO,
I never realized you had such a fantastic blogsite 😉
I live on “Bad things make good stories” I constantly tell my family…this is gonna make a good story someday.