Living on the road- The down side…

AD has a great post HERE about training a dog… It’s about being there, and handling the situation day to day.


Sadly, my co-worker got a call early this morning from his wife that one of their dogs was ‘sick’…

After our meetings, he caller her back to get a status, only to find out the dog has terminal cancer and needs to be put down tomorrow…

This dog is 12 years old, the same age as the youngest daughter, and is ‘mommas’ dog. He was in tears, and was telling his wife he could be there tomorrow morning, only to be told no stay on the road.

Now he will have to live with not being there to say good-by to the dog, being there for his wife and daughter, and being able to take care of things that need to be done.

Everybody thinks travel and road trips are ‘fun’ because we get to go all these places, stay in hotels and eat out all the time and don’t do much “real work”…

After 39+ years of this, trust me it’s NOT all fun. What happened today is just a microcosm of the downside… Pets dying, family dying, friends dying, and you’re not there; can’t get there (especially if you’re on active duty and deployed). Missed births, birthdays, anniversaries, parties, football/soccer/recitals/graduations… and the list goes on and on…

All of those things WILL be thrown back in your face sooner or later…

We seldom go anywhere new, frankly we don’t get to stay in the high $$ hotels, we seldom get days off, and the per diem doesn’t really cover the cost of ‘good’ meals; much less cover the cost of ‘real’ entertainment…

The other problems are sleep cycles, adjusting to strange locations (hotels creak and pop, in addition to the occasional “enthusiastic” performers next door banging the walls), food issues (like a seafood allergy in Japan).

And quite honestly just plain old loneliness…

It’s hard to always be the ‘single’ going into a restaurant, you normally carry a book just to break the monotony, and to ‘look’ busy…

I talked yesterday about playing golf- that round of golf means I’m eating cheap (McDonalds or PBJ) for the entire trip just to keep from losing $$…

In addition, we are working off site, which means things are piling up back home, and you can only do so much over the phone and on email without ALL your files available and the time differences. Also the stresses of decision making take their toll after a while…

Most of us don’t ‘choose’ this as a career, so much as be put in a position where travel becomes a ‘limited’ requirement (I can remember the offer letter saying travel less that 10% of the time); then gradually increases either due to increased responsibility or increased taskers…

Then your choice is get off the road (and lose the job) or suck it up and suffer the consequences at home (if you have a life left)…

Sigh…

Kicking the soapbox back in the corner now… say a prayer for my friend and all those others who can’t be home when they really want to and need to…

Comments

Living on the road- The down side… — 14 Comments

  1. My heart goes out to your colleague in particular, and in general to all those who sacrifice so much personally in service of our country. I know it’s a tough row to hoe, and my hat is off to anyone who makes that selfless sacrifice.

  2. I know how you feel. Last year I was out at-sea when my girlfriend had to have our oldest dog at the time put down.
    And I’ve been with crewmates who had family members pass away, kids graduate and get married and other problems at home that they couldn’t be there to attend.
    Glamorous job? Riiiight!

  3. My wife’s Boxer just passed away a few weeks ago. He was also 12, which is very old for a Boxer. She liberated him from a pound in SoCal. He had a nice life while he was here. She’s always taken older doggies and rescued them from pounds. She won’t take pups; only the older dogs that few people want.

    BZ

  4. Many years ago when still married I arranged for child care and took my wife on my sales trip. 6 p.m. rolls around and she asked me when and where the motel was. I explained we still had about two hours to go. She then accused me of deliberately making the trip seem harder. I gave her my logs and requested she find anything different about my last three swings through this territory.

    All the years and miles doing a job others couldn’t or wouldn’t do to keep the wolf from the door was my choice. I never wanted anyone’s sympathy but a little gratitude would have been nice.

  5. Sorry to hear about your colleague’s situation.

    I guess that there are pluses and minuses to every job, some days it seems that the minueses outweigh the pluses.

  6. Thanks for doing the job in spite of the challenges you and your colleagues face. Thanks for being there in your past career to defend me and mine. It is saddening to hear that someone has to lose a beloved pet. They do enrich our lives with their unconditional love for us. Prayers for everyone involved.

  7. Our thoughts are with your colleague. I know what it is to lose a beloved pet. They are part of the family.
    As for you I have always wondered how you do what you do. It is something that I could never do, traveling constantly, the time changes, the stress, ect.
    Know that you always have a place to come to and just relax when you can.

  8. mMy son is starting a new position in his company. He will be travelling to different towns in the midwest. He was told he’d be working 4 days and home 3, but he will still be gone. It means a lot more money, but we’ll see.

    I’m sorry for your colleague.

  9. I have found the farther from home the more likely the disaster. When I’m in Eastern Europe or the Middle East I know as soon as I call home the damage report will begin. Truthfully I’m flinchy about it now.

    I’m lucky to have good neighbors.

    “Oh traveling overseas must be so thrilling!” RIGHT!
    ” You must make out on expenses.” I lose money on every trip.

    Gerry

  10. That exact same thing happened to me while I was out on the road. There was no option for me going home.

    Life on the road sucks. The hotel rooms all look the same. Same rental cars. Same planes. Go to NYC Sunday, drive to CT Tuesday, fly to Detroit Thursday, no wait, flight canceled. Fly home that night and out to Detroit at 6am. On site till 10. Get to hotel, but the restaurant’s closed. Oops one bright spot, bartender makes a sandwich.

    Earned thousands of frequent flyer points that I didn’t have time to use.

    I did that for almost 5 years. Never again.

    And the worst part was the time I didn’t get to spend with my kids.

  11. A couple of decades ago, I worked for a computer company. I was 3rd tier maintenance, hardware & software, and covered a territory of seven states. Frequently, I’d leave home Monday morning and return late on Friday. At least once every 45 days I spent a week at the corporate hqs in San Antonio.

    I worked for them 12 years. During that time I missed four of my daughters first birthdays, almost her birth (getting home a few hours before taking her mother off to the hospital,) the death of my Father-in-law (in the air to SA,) and numerous other personal and school events.

    After leaving that job, I swore never to spend so much time away from home. It just wasn’t worth it. I’d missed most of my daughter’s first 12 years. I wasn’t going to miss any more.

  12. I know its hard losing a pet. We lost our beloved Sam the worlds best dog in Dec of 07. It feels like you are losing a very close family member. My heart goes out to your Collegue. I feel for you guys being on the road so much. Its got to be tough being away from those you love.