Can’t find anything good to say, so I’m going with jokes… sigh…
It seems that God was tired, and wanted to take a vacation. However, being everywhere at once, it was a little difficult for him to decide on where to go. So, he called the Archangel Gabriel in on the carpet…
GOD: Gabe, I’ve got a problem, and I was hoping you could help me out.
GABRIEL: I’ll try lord.
GOD: Well, I need a vacation, and I can’t decide where I should go, and I was hoping that you could give me some suggestions.
( Gabriel thinks intently for a few seconds,…)
GABRIEL: How about Mercury? That’s a nice place.
GOD: Nope, too hot. It takes all night to get over the sun-burn you got during the day.
( Gabriel thinks a little longer…..)
GABRIEL: Hmmmm,…. Well, how about Mars?
GOD: Nope, Mars is too much of a party place. All that whooping and hollering, I never get any rest when I go there.
( Gabriel is starting to get a little desperate by this time….)
GABRIEL: Well, how about Earth?
GOD: NO!! No Way!! The last time I went there, I got this little Jewish girl pregnant, and I haven’t heard the end of that yet!
Here’s another one….
An engineer dies and reports to the pearly gates. St. Peter checks his dossier and says, “Ah, you’re an engineer — you’re in the wrong place.”
So the engineer reports to the gates of hell and is let in. Pretty soon, the engineer gets dissatisfied with the level of comfort in hell, and starts designing and building improvements. After a while, they’ve got air conditioning and flush toilets and escalators, and the engineer is a pretty popular guy.
One day, God calls Satan up on the telephone and says with a sneer,
“So, how’s it going down there in hell?”
Satan replies, “Hey, things are going great. We’ve got air conditioning and flush toilets and escalators, and there’s no telling what this engineer is going to come up with next.”
God replies, “What??? You’ve got an engineer? That’s a mistake -he should never have gotten down there; send him up here.”
Satan says, “No way. I like having an engineer on the staff, and I’m keeping him.”
God says, “Send him back up here or I’ll sue.”
Satan laughs uproariously and answers, “Yeah, right. And just where are YOU going to get a lawyer?”
And a couple of pics that kinda say it all…
I REALLY need one of these for the commute to work…
And in other news, the meter is damn near pegged with the BS going on around this town…
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