Husar’s Laws, Part 10…

Posted on by February 17, 2015
  • The first piece of luggage on the carousel never belongs to anyone.
  • I have kleptomania, but when it gets bad, I take something for it.
  • A computer once beat me at chess but it was no match for me at kickboxing.
  • Lawyers believe a man is innocent until he is proven broke.
  • A gun is like a parachute. If you need one, and don’t have one, you’ll probably never need one  again.”
  • The quickest way to double your money is to fold it and put it back in your pocket.
  • There are two theories to arguing with a woman. Neither works.
  • I started out with nothing and I still have most of it.
  • Just because you’ve always done it that way doesn’t mean it’s not incredibly stupid.
  • If at first you don’t succeed, better refer to it as a learning experience instead of a failure.
  • Letting the cat out of the bag is a whole lot easier than putting it back.
  • The older we get, the fewer things seem worth waiting in line for.
  • I don’t know how I got over the hill without getting to the top.
  • You are not stupid, I just think you have bad luck when thinking.
  • You can’t un-ring a bell.
  • The two most useless things in flying are altitude above you and runway behind you.
  • Half the lies they tell about me aren’t true.
  • Always go to other people’s funerals, otherwise they won’t come to yours.
  • When a man opens a car door for his wife, it’s either a new car or a new wife.
  • The only reason they say “women and children first” is to check the strength of the lifeboats.

Comments

Husar’s Laws, Part 10… — 12 Comments

  1. That funeral quote was Yogi Berra’s, but if you want to include it with Husar’s Laws, it fits.

    Yogi’s stuff should have more representation here, NFO. Like “nobody ever goes there anymore. It’s too crowded.” Or, “I never said half the stuff I said.” I like that one. Or, “if you come to a fork in the road, take it.” Sound advice.

  2. The third most useless thing to a pilot…fuel in the truck.

  3. Mack’s corollary to the luggage law:
    When using your duffel bag when flying commerical; you will always wind up on a flight with a reserve unit going somewhere TDY.

  4. Fredd- Good point. Yogi and Casey Stengel were a pair…

    Juvat- Good point too! Unless you can put a fuel truck on a BRU-14…LOL

    SPE- ROTF- That’s why I used parachute bags…

  5. I do not wait in line for much anymore. Another useless thing on the plane…screaming children.

  7. Fargo- ESPECIALLY when you’re surrounded by them and one is kicking your seat back… sigh

    WSF- Amen to that…

  8. And how did the car door opening chivalry devolve to using the remote to unlock the wife’s side and then she lets herself in.

    And she can and does load her own magazines.

    John in Philly

  10. That first piece of luggage thing, absolutely true. I think it serves as a decoy to make the passengers all think their luggage actually was on the same plane as them.

    Me? Bitter? Nah.

  11. JOhn- LOL

    Aguila- Trying!

    Old AF- Hey, they lost mine on a DIRECT flight! I didn’t see it for three @@*&% days.