Bless his heart…

Sooo… Yesterday evening, I’m at the local grocery store with a set of gas pumps offset from the main store, filling up my tank when a high end Mercedes SUV comes pulling in with a low tire… I’m standing maybe 20 feet away and I’m wondering who is driving.

It’s got a vanity plate, and is from Dallas. Out climbs this 20 something yuppie, you know the type, perfect hair, de rigueur gold rimmed aviator sunglasses, carefully groomed moustache, pink oxford button down, khaki shorts, and boat shoes…

He walks around the back of the SUV, looks down at the tire, kicks it, and goes over to the air machine. He picks up the hose, looks at it (it’s obvious he’s never seen one of these up close), tries various things, drops it in disgust, and goes stomping into the little store/gas office.

A minute or so later, the lady on duty comes out, points to the slot on the side of the air machine and says rather loudly, “You’ve got to put money in it. Right there!”

He sniffed (I kid you not), and said, “I never carry cash.”

Disgusted, she shakes her head and replies, again loudly, “Well, sir, I would suggest you walk over to the main store and use the ATM, orΒ (where, oh where is the sarcasm font when I need it), you can call Mercedes service. I’m sure they would be happy to come out and help you.”

He looked at the distance to the main store (probably 60 yards), went back and got in the SUV. She walked by me shaking her head and muttering imprecations under her breath, including ‘Bless his heart’…

When I left, he was on the phone, to whom I have no idea, but if he DID call for service, I’d love to see the tech’s expression when he shows up to find this high end SUV PARKED IN FRONT OF THE AIR MACHINE!!!

I laughed all the way home…

Edit- Dayum, that is an EXPENSIVE SUV Mercedes GLS580 starts at $98,000!!!



Bless his heart… — 36 Comments

  1. Well just because you are rich doesn’t mean you are practical or smart.

  2. All Dollars (or Dallas) and no sense? Hand him the big fencepost, he’s dug pretty deep already.

  3. Ugh. Bless his heart is right. I guess he wanted someone to do it for him. Because he didn’t know how and was too stupid to want to learn.

  4. I predict he will do well in the Apocalypse/CW2/whatever. (insert eyeroll emoji).

  5. You should have offered him fifty dollars for his SUV!
    He might have taken it…

    Retired Cop

  6. I never carry cash either. Getting cash out of the ATM might be a start, but since COVID half the businesses around here don’t give change.

    Just saying.

    Sounds like he might have been a douche, though, without which it is an uninteresting story. 😁

  7. I bet his dad used to take care of any problems he may have had in past. While there are exceptions(Casey’s General Stores), the days of free air are largely gone. Some years back I picked up a cheap electric pump that has resided in the pickup ever since. I can use it whenever and wherever I need to. I have no sympathy for the entitled little boy.

  8. Just another point for the argument that money doesn’t make you smarter, or even a better driver. “It’s broken. Somebody fix it!” doesn’t work, either. But yet such people howl it at the skies daily. Perhaps leaving them to their own fate is … nah, never mind. That type rarely learns anything except that the universe is against them that day.

  9. Monied but not educated. Those like the one you describe I let flounder. If, however, that person made even the smallest attempt to help themselves, I would most likely have provided advice or assistance. Otherwise, laugh and let ’em learn a valuable life lesson.

  10. I’ve had even worse experiences with Jaguar drivers. One ran out of gas on a test drive and instead of walking two blocks to get some called the dealer who sent a truck to block the road.

    You’d think that with that much money they could afford some manners.

  11. I would have been tempted to wait and see what happens. Maybe make a utube video. nah, i don’t have enough time for idiots

  12. These people have deliberately crafted a lifestyle that can only be lived in large metro areas, and in which they never have to get their hands dirty. Oh, to see the festivities when Antifa comes to their neighborhoods.

  13. About every three years or so I pull off the side of the road to help some young, entitled prat change a flat tire.

    But… now, a lot of new cars that are designed to be used in the city don’t even have a spare tire. It’s an ‘option,’ spare tire and mount with jack and stuff.

    As to the Mercedes, a lot of luxury cars come with an air pump either included or as a small dollar extra. Be funny if the mechanic pulls up, pulls out the car’s air pump and pumps away, though it’s more likely that the mech will have a portable air tank or a higher-powered compressor.

    • I’ve never ridden in a German car that didn’t come with an inflator when new.

      Often, these days, the traditional spare is replaced by that inflator and a can of sealant.

      … and the entire process to use it is covered in pictures in the owner’s manual.

  14. Funny, I was out quad riding with my son over the weekend, we were way back into middle of nowhere and we ran into a Range Rover with a flat tire. The two millennial ‘Gucci’ guys had no idea where the spare was or how to change it. Both were in Izod clothes top to bottom, no extra water or anything. With the local trail restrictions they were very lucky since there is no cell reception out there for miles. Lots of ways that could have gone bad for them as they didnt know where they were or hot to get out.

  15. Hey Old NFO;

    “All Hat, No Cattle”, as they say in Texas, LOL. A lot of places don’t have “free” air anymore, we used to have a place, but the assholes kept cutting the airhoses at the gas station and the proprietor finally stopped it and started charging for no other reason than the charging of the air paid for the replacement air hoses. Some people in the case of the apocalypses will be lunch for the predators that will appear.

  16. All- Glad I’m not the only one that doesn’t ‘care’ for these types… I haven’t seen free air in a LONG time.

    Posted from my iPhone.

  17. Hmm, the air pump at the Tribal complex (casino/hotel/travel center) actually had (circa two years ago) free air. I didn’t need gas, but bought a snack so they got some return for their freebie. I don’t know if they charge now; don’t go that way often.

  18. I have never been a “strong man” but by my nature I would have helped him. Another human in need. My life problems are not his fault. And, he doesn’t know what he doesn’t know – and neither do any of us. Just me.

  19. How much brains do you need to operate an air pump? Or change a tire?

    Let me draw you a little story. I once got a flat in the middle of a pounding rainstorm on the way to work, many years ago.

    I had NEVER changed a flat before, but I had picked up enough via osmosis to know how to work a jack and remove the tire.

    I might’ve been soaked to the bone, but I changed out the tire and proceeded on to work. Fortunately, the boss let me call home (was still with parents at the time) and Dad brought a change of dry clothes.

    Still, I like to take a LITTLE pride in my first flat change being under less than ideal conditions πŸ™‚

  20. I went inside and said “Hey, y’all have free air, but there’s no hose. Um?” Guy says “Yeah, the dopers keep cutting of the valve at the end of the hose to use as a bowl to smoke meth.” Me: “So, you got a spare inside? I have a low tire.” Guy: “Nah, we haven’t replaced it yet, but when we do, you can come inside for the hose.” I thanked him and hauled out my itty-bitty oil-less compressor. It lasted about five tires before crapping out. Sigh. This is not a comment about entitled brats so much as venting about idiot druggies and cheap equipment. Thanks for your time reading.

  21. (Don McCollor)…In the 1930s, my grandfather ran a low-service gas station. A sign said “Free Air”. If the costumer asked for air, he got handed a manual tire pump…

  22. 3Score- Had it NOT been for his attitude, I would have…

    Toast- Good for you! I taught both daughters how to change tires, check oil, water, charge a battery, etc. and change oil if necessary before I ever allowed them to drive.

    Robert- Sigh, heard that complaint before, and yes, those things are good for maybe ONE emergency use… if that…

    Don- Ouch! πŸ™‚

  23. My Dad ran a trucking business all the time I was growing up. Learned how to jack up a vehicle and spin off the lug nuts with a big old 4 way wrench. Then it was time to remove the split ring so you could get the tire off the rim to fix the tube etc. etc.. Loved it when we got our first compressor and air impact tool!
    Hell, I’d fix anybodies flat just to run the Impact!

  24. The really scary thing about that fellow is he will vote, and he will more than likely breed up another one.

  25. I bet he’s leasing it. Most of the people with the really expensive cars lease them, so they can look richer than they actually are.

    • Spent many years in the car biz including time at the Ford store that was #1 in Red Carpet Leases 14 years in a row. We called it, bore and stroke (down and payment). If you had the patience to listen to all the customers “educated” b.s., eventually 8 – 9 out of 10 would go for what got them into a car with the minimum cash out of pocket and lowest monthly payment. Taurus sale – $600 gross profit. Taurus lease – $3200 gross profit. We had a system (dog and pony show) for the way we presented it.

  26. 98K! You could buy a house for that in several places.

    Good Lord.

    I’m holding back on a 12k fleet 150… well, I do know how to change a flat tire. So.

  27. Ev- Why does this NOT surprise me??? πŸ˜‰

    Suz- True… sigh

    John- Possible.

    WSF- Oh yeah, friend of mine made a LOT of money doing that!

    LSP- I hear ya!

  28. Dood needs to take heed… ( I gotta find one) Was leavin’ Bass Pro and the dude in the car next to me came back to find his rear right tire quite low.. he goes into the glove compartment an pulls out this “device” .. screws the hose onto his ailing tire and plugs the cord into his car’s cigarette lighter!! Not even 5 minutes later he and his date are on their way!!!
    Nuff said!!
    ‘PS wasn’t a Beemer or the like but still “high end”


  29. My years of observation has made me aware of how much ignorance money can buy.