In the daily battle between you and the world, bet on the world.
Do not attend a gunfight with a handgun whose caliber doesn’t start with a “4”
Anything worth shooting is worth shooting twice. Ammo is cheap; life is expensive.
Always cheat. Always win. The only unfair fight is the one you lose.
The rule of the “3” F’s. If it floats, flies or f**ks rent it, don’t buy it.
Have a plan. Have a back-up plan. Because the first on probably won’t work.
I joined a procrastinator’s club. We haven’t met yet.
I don’t trip over things; I do random gravity checks.
I don’t need anger management; I need people to stop pissing me off.
Old age is coming at a really bad time.
The biggest lie I tell myself is “I don’t need to write it down, I’ll remember it
Lord grant me the strength to accept the things I can’t change, the courage to change the things I can change and friends to bail me out when I finally snap
My people skills are just fine. It’s my tolerance for idiots that needs work.
Even duct tape can’t fix stupid but it can muffle it up.
You know that tingly little feeling you get when you really like someone you’ve just met? That’s common sense leaving your body
315. I decided to change calling the bathroom the John and renamed it the Jim. I feel so much better saying I went to the Jim this morning.
A fool and his money can throw one heck of a party.
When blondes have more fun, do they know it?
Learn from your parents mistakes. Use birth control.
We were born naked, wet and hungry. Then things got worse.
Writing it down. Why is it that sometimes we go to get the notepad, (actual paper) and then stand there holding it and realize we have no idea why we got the notepad.
A true procrastinator would be planning on joining the club anytime now.
If you think, “what possibly could go wrong” about any action, then do not take that action!
Good list.
:^)
Thanks for the Monday chuckles, I needed that !
If you think, “what possibly could go wrong” about any action, then do not take that action!
Rules to teach our kids! Lol.
Agree with the duct tape, anger management, gravity check rules, and writing down stuff…
Great way to begin the week 🙂
Suz
I think the second one needs to be shortened to.
“Do not attend a gunfight with a handgun…”
Hmmm…I don’t know if I agree with the second one. LOL
LOL, everybody hit on the two ‘I’ had problems with/questions about… 🙂
Fargo- Go ahead with that .50 cal… I’ll check back with you after the first cylinder… 😀
Thanks for the smiles