Santa’s on the go…

Jeff MacNelly was a friend of the military, and especially of the Navy.  He did a number of ‘special’ cartoons over the years for those of us who served…

This is one of my favorites…  Sadly he passed way too young in 2000 due to lymphoma.shoexmas

Author unknown, but a damn good one…

This one goes out to Alma, Brigid, Frito, Flake, JD, Jim, Juvat, JP, Joe and all the other aviators out there…

‘Twas the night before Christmas, and out on the ramp,
Not an airplane was stirring, not even a Champ.
The aircraft were fastened to tiedowns with care,
In hopes that come morning, they all would be there.

The fuel trucks were nestled, all snug in their spots,
With gusts from two-forty at 39 knots.
I slumped at the fuel desk, now finally caught up,
And settled down comfortably, resting my butt.

When the radio lit up with noise and with chatter,
I turned up the scanner to see what was the matter.
A voice clearly heard over static and snow,
Called for clearance to land at the airport below.

He barked his transmission so lively and quick,
I’d have sworn that the call sign he used was “St. Nick”;
I ran to the panel to turn up the lights,
The better to welcome this magical flight.

He called his position, no room for denial,
“St. Nicholas One, turnin’ left onto final.”
And what to my wondering eyes should appear,
But a Rutan-built sleigh, with eight Rotax Reindeer!

With vectors to final, down the glideslope he came,
As he passed all fixes, he called them by name:
“Now Ringo! Now Tolga! Now Trini and Bacun!
On Comet! On Cupid!” What pills was he takin’?

While controllers were sittin’, and scratchin’ their head,
They phoned to my office, and I heard it with dread,
The message they left was both urgent and dour:
“When Santa pulls in, have him please call the tower.”

He landed like silk, with the sled runners sparking,
Then I heard “Left at Charlie,” and “Taxi to parking.”
He slowed to a taxi, turned off of three-oh
And stopped on the ramp with a “Ho, ho-ho- ho…”

He stepped out of the sleigh, but before he could talk,
I ran out to meet him with my best set of chocks.
His red helmet and goggles were covered with frost
And his beard was all blackened from Reindeer exhaust.

His breath smelled like peppermint, gone slightly stale,
And he puffed on a pipe, but he didn’t inhale.
His cheeks were all rosy and jiggled like jelly,
His boots were as black as a cropduster’s belly.

He was chubby and plump, in his suit of bright red,
And he asked me to “fill it, with hundred low-lead.”
He came dashing in from the snow-covered pump,
I knew he was anxious for drainin’ the sump.

I spoke not a word, but went straight to my work,
And I filled up the sleigh, but I spilled like a jerk.
He came out of the restroom, and sighed in relief,
Then he picked up a phone for a Flight Service brief.

And I thought as he silently scribed in his log,
These reindeer could land in an eighth-mile fog.
He completed his pre-flight, from the front to the rear,
Then he put on his headset, and I heard him yell, “Clear!”

And laying a finger on his push-to-talk,
He called up the tower for clearance and squawk.
“Take taxiway Charlie, the southbound direction,
Turn right three-two-zero at pilot’s discretion.”

He sped down the runway, the best of the best,
“Your traffic’s a Grumman, inbound from the west.”
Then I heard him proclaim, as he climbed through the night,
“Merry Christmas to all! I have traffic in sight.”

Tis the season…

This one has a special meaning to all those who served…

Twas the night before Christmas, he lived all alone

  In a one bedroom house made of plaster and stone

  I had come down the chimney with presents to give

  And to see just who in this home did live

 

  I looked all about, a strange sight I did see

  No tinsel, no presents, not even a tree

  No stocking by mantle, just boots filled with sand

  On the wall hung pictures of far distant lands

 

  With medals and badges, awards of all kinds

  A sober thought did come through my mind

  For this house was different, it was dark and dreary

  I found the home of a soldier, once I could see clearly

 

  The soldier lay sleeping, silent and alone

  Curled up on the floor in this one bedroom home

  The face was so gentle, the room in such disorder

  Not how I pictured a United States soldier

 

  Was this the hero of whom I’d just read?

  Curled up on a poncho, the floor for a bed?

  I realized the families that I saw this night

  Owed their lives to these soldiers who were willing to fight

 

  Soon round the world, the children would play

  And grownups would celebrate a bright Christmas day

  They all enjoyed freedom each month of the year

  Because of the soldiers, like the one lying here

 

  I couldn’t help wonder how many lay alone

  On a cold Christmas eve in a land far from home

  The very thought brought a tear to my eye

  I dropped to my knees and started to cry

 

  The soldier awakened and I heard a rough voice

  Santa don’t cry, this life is my choice

  I fight for freedom, I don’t ask for more

  My life is my God, my Country, my Corps

 

  The soldier rolled over and drifted to sleep

  I couldn’t control it, I continued to weep

  I kept watch for hours, so silent and still

  And we both shivered from the cold nights chill

 

  I didn’t want to leave on that cold, dark, night

  This guardian of honor so willing to fight

  Then the soldier rolled over, with a voice soft and pure

  Whispered Carry on Santa, all is secure

 

  One look at my watch and I knew he was right

  Merry Christmas, my friend, and to all a good night

 

  By:  Major Bruce Lovely, adopted from a similar poem

  by Anonymous.

++++++++++

Twas the Night Before Christmas in Yonkers

 

   ‘Twas the night before Christmas,

    Da whole house was mella,

    Not a creature was stirrin’,

    Cuz I had a gun unda da pilla.

 

    When up on da roof

    I heard somethin’ pound,

    I sprung to da window,

    To scream, “YO! Keep it down!”

 

    When what to my

    Wanderin’ eyes should appear,

    But da Don of all elfs,

    And eight friggin’ reindeer!

 

    Wit’ slicked back black hair,

    And a silk red suit,

    Don Christopher wuz here,

    And he brought da loot!

 

    Wit’ a slap to dare snouts,

    And a yank on dare manes,

    He cursed and he shouted,

    And he called dem by name.

 

    “Yo Tony, Yo Frankie,

    Yo Vinny, Yo Vito,

    Ay Joey, Ay Paulie,

    Ay Pepe, Ay Guido!”

 

    As I drew out my gun

    And hid by da bed,

    He flew troo da winda

    And slapped me up side da head.

 

    “What da hell you doin’

    Pullin’ a gun on da Don?

    Now all you’re gettin’ is coal,

    You friggin’ moron!”

 

    Den pointin’ a fat finga

    Right unda my nose,

    He twisted his pinky ring,

    And up da chimney he rose.

 

    He sprang to his sleigh,

    Obscenities screamin’,

    Away dey all flew,

    Before he troo dem a beatin’.

 

    Den I heard him yell out,

    Two, tree times, I expect

    “Merry Friggin’ Christmas to all,

    And you’s better show some respect!

++++++++++++

T’was the night before Christmas – Old Santa was pissed

He cussed out the elves and threw down his list

Miserable little brats, ungrateful little jerks

I have a good mind to scrap the whole works

I’ve busted my ass for damn near a year

Instead of “Thanks Santa” – what do I hear

The old lady bitches cause I work late at night

The elves want more money – The reindeer all fight

Rudolph got drunk and goosed all the maids

Donner is pregnant and Vixen has AIDS

And just when I thought that things would get better

Those assholes from IRS sent me a letter

They say I owe taxes – if that ain’t damn funny

Who the hell ever sent Santa Clause any money

And the kids these days – they all are the pits

They want the impossible …Those mean little shits

I spent a whole year making wagons and sleds Assembling dolls…Their

arms,

legs and heads I made tons of yo yo’s – No request for them They want

computers and robots…they think I’m IBM!

If you think that’s bad…just picture this

Try holding those brats…with their pants full of piss

They pull on my nose – they grab at my beard

And if I don’t smile…their moms think I’m weird

Flying through the air…dodging the trees

Falling down chimneys and skinning my knees

I’m quitting this job…there’s just no enjoyment

I’ll sit on my fat ass and draw unemployment

There’s no Christmas this year…now you know the reason

I found me a blonde.. I’m going SOUTH for the season!!

++++++++++++

I think Santa Claus is a woman….

I hate to be the one to defy sacred myth, but I believe he’s a she.

Think about it. Christmas is a big, organized, warm, fuzzy, nurturing social deal, and I have a tough time believing a guy could  possibly pull it all off!

For starters, the vast majority of men don’t even think about selecting gifts until Christmas Eve. Once at the mall, they always seem surprised to find only Ronco products, socket wrench sets, and mood rings left on the shelves.  On this count alone, I’m convinced Santa is a woman.

Surely, if he were a man, everyone in the universe would wake up Christmas morning to find a rotating musical Chia Pet under the tree, still in the bag.

Another problem for a he-Santa would be getting there.  First of all, there would be no reindeer because they would all be dead, gutted  and strapped on to the rear bumper of the sleigh amid wide-eyed, desperate claims that buck season had been extended. Blitzen’s rack would already be on the way to the taxidermist.  Even if the male Santa DID have reindeer, he’d still have  transportation problems because he would inevitably get lost up there in the snow and clouds and then refuse to stop and ask for directions.

Other reasons why Santa can’t possibly be a man:

    – Men can’t pack a bag.

    – Men would rather be dead than caught wearing red velvet.

    – Men would feel their masculinity is threatened…having to be seen with all those elves.

    – Men don’t answer their mail.

    – Men would refuse to allow their physique to be described even in jest as anything remotely resembling a “bowlful of jelly.”

    – Men aren’t interested in stockings unless somebody’s wearing them.

    – Having to do the Ho Ho Ho thing would seriously inhibit their ability to pick up women.

  – Finally, being responsible for Christmas would require a commitment.

I can buy the fact that other mythical holiday characters are men………Father Time shows up once a year unshaven and looking ominous.  Definite guy.

Cupid flies around carrying weapons.

Uncle Sam is a politician who likes to point fingers.  Any one of these individuals could pass the testosterone screening test.

But not St. Nick.  Not a chance.

Enjoy your time with your families, and take a moment to remember those who are far from home this holiday season, standing the watch wherever they may be.

Sweet!!!

I came home to find an ‘extra’ box sitting on the front porch yesterday…

Many thanks to Lucky Gunner for the outstanding Christmas present!

I’ve supported these folks for years, and they are a link on my sidebar, but my ‘profits’ go back as donations to a charity of their choice. Every year I get a little something from them, and it’s always nice, but this year…

I REALLY appreciate this one! Especially since I have a couple or three of these in the safe.

Sorry for the lousy shot, but I’m trying to figure out where to hang it today!

Thanks Lucky Gunner! Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to y’all!

Done…

Rimworld- Militia Up is live on Kindle!

Due to changes in the way Amazon is doing the print version, that’s going to be at least a week behind the Kindle version.

I’ve roofpread it until I’m cross eyed, so any errors are on me. I don’t have a link yet, but here’s the cover!  As always, kudos to Tina for turning my bumbling attempts at artwork into a real cover!!!

Click the cover to go to the Amazon link!

The blurb-

It was supposed to be a simple contract for a couple of months of security services off world, but the devil’s in the details.

Tight Bridge Technologies hired Ethan Fargo and his militia to guard their power stations on the planet Endine against mob unrest and sabotage. When they arrive, they find the planetary authorities don’t want outsiders around to uncover their dirty secrets, and the Galactic Patrol’s not interested in providing backup. They all but order him to stop making waves, kicking asses, and taking names. The harder Fargo works to keep his people safe, the more troubles he finds. Dragoons and pirates are stalking the outer system, while the planet itself is a snakepit of treachery, tyranny, rebellion, and corruption. Everyone wants him to fail, while taking the blame.

They made one mistake: they underestimated Ethan Fargo. After the mob kills two of his Ghorkas, and kidnap his lady,  he’s out for blood, and to hell with anything in his way…

And Rimworld- Into the Green will be on sale through next week, hopefully starting on Saturday for $0.99!

Thanks for sticking by me, and I hope you enjoy the novel! As always, HONEST reviews are appreciated! And if you catch errors, feel free to email me, and I’ll get ’em corrected!

Special thanks to those Alpha and Beta readers who really helped get this ready to go to print! You know who you are!!!

TBT…

For us old farts…

The christmas trees ‘we’ grew up with…

And who remembers trying to ‘assemble’ these things! Sigh… 

These got assembled and then we ‘disassembled’ multiple times.

My mother was always griping about us eating the decorations… LOL

And remember Toys for Tots, they provide toys for kids that otherwise wouldn’t get any. It’s a great cause, and one I support every year!

Posted in TBT

Cooking…

Since I’m the only one that isn’t ‘down’ with something, I volunteered to cook last night…

Note to self- NEVER volunteer, you know better…

Now, what to fix? Uh… er… food?

Quick and easy, and easily divisible by three… Been meaning to try King Ranch Chicken, yeah, yeah, that’s it… And black-eyed peas!

Scramble around the grocery store get the ingredients, come home and chop, cut, do chicken, etc. And found a package of ‘tins’ for hot food with covers at the store, threw them in the cart too!

This is one of three little baking tins, came out of the oven just about the time LawDog showed up, and he agreed to deliver for Peter and Dot. Yea!!!  JimJim got the leftovers… LOL

I’m sure glad it tastes better than it looks! 🙂

If you’re curious, here’s the recipe- With my mods in italics

1 large onion, chopped

1 large green bell pepper, chopped

2 tablespoons vegetable oil

2 cups chopped cooked chicken (Doubled to 4 cups)

1 (10 3/4-ounce) can cream of chicken soup, undiluted

1 (10 3/4-ounce) can cream of mushroom soup, undiluted

1 (10-ounce) can diced tomato and green chiles (Plus one medium can mild Hatch Chiles)

1 teaspoon chili powder (Doubled to 2 tsp)

1/4 teaspoon salt

1/4 teaspoon garlic powder

1/4 teaspoon pepper (Doubled to 1/2 tsp)

12 (6-inch) corn tortillas

2 cups (8 ounces) shredded Cheddar cheese, divided (Doubled to 4 cups)

How to Make It

Step 1- Sauté onion and bell pepper in hot oil in a large skillet over medium-high heat 5 minutes or until tender. Stir in chicken and next 7 ingredients; remove from heat.

Step 2- Tear tortillas into 1-inch pieces; layer one-third of tortilla pieces in bottom of a lightly greased 13- x 9-inch baking dish. Top with one-third of chicken mixture and 2/3 cup cheese. Repeat layers twice.

Step 3- Bake at 350° for 30 to 35 minutes.

Step 4- Enjoy!

Note- It was still pretty mild, to my taste, YMMV… 🙂

Thank you!!!

Thank you to all who gave to the ex-wife’s Go Fund Me, HERE. They didn’t get their goal, but y’all helped to get it to where it is.

She sent a very nice thank you card I’d like to share with y’all.

Y’all are great, and I truly appreciate your stepping up. Thank you!

Christmas cutbacks…

The recent announcement that Donner and Blitzen have elected to take the early reindeer retirement package has triggered a good deal of concern about whether they will be replaced, and about other restructuring decisions at the North Pole.

Streamlining was appropriate in view of the reality that the North Pole no longer dominates the season’s gift distribution business. Home Shopping channels and online sales have diminished Santa’s market share and they could not sit idly by and permit further erosion of the profit picture.

The reindeer downsizing was made possible through the purchase of a late model Japanese sled for the CEO’s annual trip. Improved productivity from Dasher and Dancer, who summered at the Harvard Business School, is anticipated and should take up the slack with no discernible loss of service. Reduction in reindeer will also lessen airborne environmental emissions for which the North Pole has been cited and received unfavorable press.

I am pleased to inform you and yours that Rudolph’s role will not be disturbed. Tradition still counts for something at the North Pole. Management denies, in the strongest possible language, the earlier leak that Rudolph’s nose got that way not from the cold, but from substance abuse. Calling Rudolph “a lush who was into the sauce and never did pull his share of the load” was an unfortunate comment, made by one of Santa’s helpers and taken out of context at a time of year when he is known to be under executive stress.

As a further restructuring, today’s global challenges require the North Pole to continue to look for better, more competitive steps.

Effective immediately, the following economy measures are to take place in the “Twelve Days of Christmas” subsidiary:

-The partridge will be retained, but the pear tree never turned out to be the cash crop forecasted. It will be replaced by a hanging plant, providing considerable savings in maintenance.

-The two turtle doves represent a redundancy that is simply not cost effective. In addition, their romance during working hours could not be condoned. The positions are therefore eliminated.

-The three French hens will remain intact. After all, everyone loves the French.

-The four calling birds were replaced by an automated voice mail system, with a call waiting option. An analysis is underway to determine who the birds have been calling, how often and how long they talked.

-The five golden rings have been put on hold by the Board of Directors. Maintaining a portfolio based on one commodity could have negative implications for institutional investors. Diversification into other precious metals as well as a mix of T-Bills and high technology stocks appear to be in order.

-The six geese-a-laying constitutes a luxury which can no longer be afforded. It has long been felt that the production rate of one egg per goose per day is an example of the decline in productivity. Three geese will be let go, and an upgrading in the selection procedure by personnel will assure management that from now on every goose it gets will be a good one.

-The seven swans-a-swimming is obviously a number chosen in better times. The function is primarily decorative. Mechanical swans are on order. The current swans will be retrained to learn some new strokes and therefore enhance their outplacement.

-As you know, the eight maids-a-milking concept has been under heavy scrutiny by the EEOC. A male/female balance in the workforce is being sought. The more militant maids consider this a dead-end job with no upward mobility. Automation of the process may permit the maids to try a-mending, a-mentoring or a-mulching.

-Nine ladies dancing has always been an odd number. This function will be phased out as these individuals grow older and can no longer do the steps.

-Ten Lords-a-leaping is overkill. The high cost of Lords plus the expense of international air travel prompted the Compensation Committee to suggest replacing the group with ten out-of-work police officers. While leaping ability may be somewhat sacrificed, the savings are significant because we expect an oversupply of unemployed officers this year.

-Eleven pipers piping and twelve drummers drumming is a simple case of the band getting too big. A substitution with a string quartet, a cutback on new music and no uniforms will produce savings which will drop right down to the bottom line.

-We can expect a substantial reduction in assorted people, fowl, animals and other expenses. Though incomplete, studies indicate that stretching deliveries over twelve days is inefficient. If we can drop ship in one day, service levels will be improved.

-Regarding the lawsuit filed by the attorneys association seeking expansion to include the legal profession (“thirteen lawyers-a- litigating”), action is pending.

-Lastly, it is not beyond consideration that deeper cuts happen, the Board will request management to scrutinize the Snow White Division to see if ‘seven dwarfs’ is a) the right number and b) changed to ‘the seven vertically challenged folk’.

 

A Sea Story…

SAR in the Atlantic…

In 22 years of Naval Aviation, this was one of my most memorable flights.

Normally these stories start off- It was a dark and stormy night… This one doesn’t… It was the typical Bermuda day. Nice onshore breeze, sunshine and a few clouds over the base. Off to the north was a hurricane running out to sea from the States.

Preflight and briefings were normal, no real ops expected since there were no “players” in the box. The crew secured around 1030 for a boring 24 hour ready one. A couple of us went to the club to get an early lunch, and the Ordy went to the Commissary to restock the chow box, since we were scheduled for a CTF/checkride coming off the alert.

About 1300 that all changed as beepers started going off- We jumped in the van and hauled to the ASW Operations Center, with three of us bailing out, while the rest of the crew continued to the aircraft. As we walked in the door, the watch officer came out of Ops and told us we had a SAR and he had notified maintenance to load the SAR kit (two rafts and an equipment package tied together). We walked back into Ops to hear one of our pilot training flights coming over the radio saying they had an EPIRB pointing North but they couldn’t get to it as the weather was too bad and they had no radar operator onboard.

We grabbed the comm gear, briefing package and a couple of charts, and caught a ride to the hangar; after getting our flight gear out of the hangar, we threw it on and walked out to the aircraft. The fuel truck was just being unhooked as flight engineer and second mech finished pulling the plugs and covers off the engines and pitot static system.

We climbed aboard, checked the SAR kit, loaded the comm gear and got a quick systems check- All stations were up, so we briefed, started engines, and taxied out. I was talking to the pilot trainer asking for their location and found they were only 10 miles North of the field. We lifted off around 1350, and immediately got into light chop.

We turned Northwest circling as we climbed to try to get a rough triangulation with the other aircraft, but both bearings were roughly North, so we turned and put the needle on the nose. Radar immediately called major cells and feeder bands directly ahead of us, and no real holes, so we decided to stay low and try to minimize the penetration.

About 5 minutes later we took multiple lightning strikes on the nose (bout half blinded the pilots and FE’s, a real Oh SHIT! moment in the airplane), and knocked out all the radios, radar, inertial systems and the computer. Oh yeah, we also were immediately in moderate turbulence, heavy rain and almost constant lightning…
We managed to get a couple of radios back on line, but the inertials were down for the count, too rough to even attempt an alignment, and we were bouncing too badly to have the in-flight tech attempt to bring the computer back on line. The forward radar wouldn’t cycle, but the aft came back up.

I reported back to the ASWOC that we had taken a lightning strike and were evaluating our status, only to be told by the ASWOC we were it, the ready two had gone down with a fuel leak and they were recalling the pilot trainer as the ready two…
We held a crew meeting on ICS, and figured what the hell; we were still flying, had comms and we could DR nav, so we would continue.

Called the ASWOC back, they told us the Coasties had launched out of Elizabeth City, but were 1-2 hours out. I passed we would press and continue the mission… What the hell, we’d been flying P-3’s into hurricanes for years, so the odds were a dissipating hurricane couldn’t hurt us much more that we already were, and we were a lot better off than whomever was under the EPIRB. We continued North after getting a TACAN fix off Bermuda and backing it up with the aft radar. Turbulence was continuing to be moderate to severe so we continued to try different altitudes and a few orbits to use the aft radar to pick holes (there weren’t any, just more feeder bands).

Finally about 90 miles out of Bermuda, we got reversal on the needle, indicating we had passed the EPIRB. Radar had nothing, so we did a mark from 10000 feet and went to call home- No joy… Oh great! Now what is going on, just static, meanwhile we are descending in an orbit to try to see what was on the water. Finally, we got comms with Jacksonville on HF, ironically perfectly clear. They were not aware of what we were doing, so it took a few minutes to get that worked out. At this point, we were descending through 1000 feet, with zilch visibility, moderate turbulence, but abating.

Passing 400 feet we break out of the clouds and the flight station eases the descent planning to level at 300 feet, the IFT calls that he thought he saw something red at 8 o’clock and there were BIG effing waves down there… It was so rough we decided not to have anyone up, and we would not drop the SAR kit unless there were people in the water, as I was afraid we would drop both the SAR kit and a crewman if we weren’t careful, since the procedure included opening the main cabin door and two people working at the door with only Gunner’s belts to keep them in the aircraft.

Flight cranked the aircraft around and stabilized at 200 feet, everybody manned the windows and we spotted a square red raft about a half mile off the port wing. We guesstimated the mark, spit a buoy and came back around one more time. The second pass, a hand came out of the raft and gave us a three count and a thumbs up. Meanwhile, I’m talking with Bermuda via Jax on a phone relay (imagine saying Over after every sentence), trying to coordinate a possible rescue. They wanted the exact range to Bermuda, so we climbed back to 10000 feet and got a fix of about 90 miles out at 010 True. The radar operator located a small contact about 10 miles away, and we descended again to locate the contact and see if the ship could come rescue the people in the raft…

We broke out at 200 feet and found a US Navy Research Ship, maintaining headway only. They told us they were taking 40 foot waves, had 60 knots of wind, gusting to 80 knots and could not attempt a rescue and they were almost in extremis themselves. We climbed back into the cloud deck and headed back to our buoy, hoping the raft would still be fairly close to it. As we were bouncing along, I continued to talk to Bermuda and the flight station came on ICS and said they had the Coast Guard C-130 inbound. I told flight to coordinate with them and get them into the area.

Bermuda came up with an option of launching the rescue helo, but it was limited to 100 nm range and would need steers to get to the raft. We went back down and relocated the raft, and determined it was drifting away from the buoy pretty quickly. We went down the drift line and placed another buoy and a smoke, coordinated air to air with the Coasties, and got them down to 300 feet and in trail with us staying at 200 feet.

Once they had the scene, we turned back toward Bermuda and told them to launch the helo, and we would meet them VFR just before the first feeder band. About 20 minutes later, we popped out of the feeder bands at 2000 feet to see the UH-1 (Huey) heading toward us and low. Flight indicated they had comms and had told the helo to stay 200 and below. We descended to 300 and slowed to 180 knots; started S-turning to allow the helo to follow us back out. We were getting bounced around pretty good, in and out of rain bands and talking to both the helo and Coastie C-130. The Coasties were telling us the raft was continuing to drift, they estimated it was 015 at 95nm, I told them 30 minutes for us to get back on scene with the helo in tow.

The helo aircraft commander (HAC) was telling us they were getting beaten up pretty good, and again stated 100nm max limit to attempt the rescue. As we passed 95nm, the HAC called again and asked how far. Flight said 7 miles to the C-130 which was orbiting the raft. The HAC came back with a standby…

Meanwhile, I’m still talking to Bermuda, giving them updates and trying to get a plot to figure out where we actually are. The HAC comes on and says he has the C-130 in sight, and estimates we are at 103nm from Bermuda; he thinks he has three to four minutes to attempt a rescue. We immediately climb to 10000 feet and get a fix, and in fact we are 104nm from Bermuda. The HAC comes on again and says he has the raft in sight one person in the water, he will low hover and only deploy the horse collar, no basket.

We start another descent, as the HAC calls one in the helo, collar out again another person in the water; I report to Bermuda via Jax as we continue to descend. The HAC reports second person in the helo, third and last person in the water and he wants a steer as this will be a drag recovery.

Flight clears the Coast Guard C-130 to the East and asked them to check on the research ship before they went home; we continue to descend, and I report three saved to Bermuda, and that both the we and helo are enroute. Now we just have to find the helo again…

We descend to 300 feet and pop out about two miles behind the helo. As we pass overhead, we tell them 85nm 187 to Bermuda. The HAC comes back thinking he will have enough gas, but it’s going to be close… We S-turn in front of the helo until he tells us they have Bermuda in the TACAN and he’s running on fumes. We climb and give the helo the priority for landing.

We land about 15 minutes later, as we taxi in, the HAC calls to tell us he flamed out one engine while he was air taxiing back to his hangar. As we pull into the parking spot, the linesman is directing us and shaking his head simultaneously…

We throw the ladder down and walk off the aircraft at 1800, it was a LONG four hours…

Remember the lightning strike? Well, as it turns out there were multiple strikes on the nose radome, at least three holes, the strikes burned the arrestor material off the radome, softened it , and collapsed the radome over the antenna, locking it in position, that explained why the forward radar wouldn’t work. We were also missing the tail cone from the MAD system in the tail section. The lightning strikes burned the bolts off and blew the foot long tail cone off somewhere over the Atlantic. To add insult to injury, all of the static wicks on the aircraft were burned off, and the lightning arrestor in the cabin was melted.

The rest of the story- The next morning we received a call from Base Ops, they wanted the crew at Ops to meet the folks we had assisted in saving. We loaded up and went over and met both the rescuees and the helo crew. The HAC told me they had just installed a new collapsible fuel bladder in the Huey, otherwise they would never have been able to make the rescue and when he landed he was showing less than 300lbs of fuel remaining!

To this day I remember the comment from one of the rescuees, he said, “I knew when I saw the P-3 we were saved.” I didn’t have the heart to tell him how close they came to NOT being saved… It turned out the three guys were ferrying a 65 foot Nautor Swan sailboat from Gibraltar to Annapolis and got caught by a rogue wave. The wave knocked the mast over, causing severe leaks and the sinking. All three were ex-Royal Navy, and one was an ex-rescue swimmer; that is what allowed them to be saved in three minutes!

They had all been through training and knew all the procedures! I understand the helo pilot was later awarded the Distinguished Flying Cross for the rescue. For us, it was just another ready one, albeit with a twist…

Ironically, in the 22 years I flew and participated in SARs, this was the ONLY time I ever met the folks we rescued after the rescue.