Cynical Definitions…

ARTIFICIAL INSEMINATION: Procreation without recreation.

BOOKCASE:  A piece of furniture used in America to house bowling trophies and Elvis collectibles.

BULIMIA: Retched excess.

CHIC: Considered smart without the deadening implication of intelligence.

CLIQUE: A group of insiders who greet outsiders with their backsides; a closed circle of asses.

CONSULTANT: A jobless person who shows executives how to work.

DENTURES: Two rows of artificial ivories that may be removed periodically to frighten one’s grandchildren or provide accompaniment to Spanish music.

DNA: A complex organic molecule characterized as the building block of life and appropriately shaped like a spiral staircase to nowhere.

ERUDITE: Exhibiting a degree of book learning fatal to success in any business or romantic enterprise.

FIBER: Edible wood-pulp said to aid digestion and prolong life, so that we might enjoy another six or eight years in which to consume wood-pulp.

FUNERAL HOME: A stately manse occupied by transients who continually receive visitors but lack the energy and inclination to entertain them.

GENETIC ENGINEERING: Tampering with chromosomes so that science might develop a new miracle cure or a rabbit that plays the banjo.

HIP: Smartly attuned to the latest cutting-edge cliches.

JOB: A state of employment everyone wants but few look forward to on a Monday morning.

LAWYER: A professional advocate hired to bend the law on behalf of a paying client; for this reason considered the most suitable background for entry into politics.

LECHER: A stud with liver spots.

LOOTING: A public shopping spree generously sponsored by local merchants in the wake of a riot.

LOTTERY: The equivalent of betting that the next pope will be from Duluth, or that the parrot in the pet store window speaks Flemish.

MATH ANXIETY: An intense lifelong fear of two trains approaching each other at speeds of 60 and 80 mph.

MUGGER: A benevolent citizen of the streets who frequently spares the lives of total strangers in exchange for any cash and valuables in their possession.

NEGOTIATING: The art of persuading your opponent to take the nice shiny copper penny and give you the wrinkled old paper money.

NEUROTIC: Sane but unhappy about it.

OBITUARY: A final summation of our lives that, for most of us, occupies about three inches of space in what will shortly become cage liner for our neighbor’s parakeet.

POSITIVE THINKING: Self-improvement through self-deception.

QUALITY OF LIFE: What an industrialized nation is said to offer when enough of its citizens are suffering from terminal stress.

REVOLUTIONARY: An oppressed person wating for the opportunity to become an oppressor.

SHALLOWNESS: The root cause of chronic good health, high school popularity, appearance on the fiction bestseller lists, and gainful employment on local TV news broadcasts.

STAR: A performer who makes more than his or her agent.  Also SUPERSTAR: A performer who makes more than Guatemala.

STATE-OF-THE-ART: Soon-to-be-obsolete.

TABOO: Any strict cultural prohibition that, when breached, causes everyone in the group  to gasp; e.g., cannibalism, public nudity, serving fried pork rinds at a Hasidic wedding, or answering the question “How are you?” in the negative.

UNEMPLOYMENT: The usual alternative to overwork.

URINAL: The one place where all men are peers.

VIRGIN: A young innocent who in former times was sacrificed to the gods but who now merely lives in disgrace.

WAKE: 1. A convivial soiree with a preserved corpse in the room.  2. What the mourners would be visibly startled to see the corpse do, especially those expecting a sizable inheritance.

X-CHROMOSOME: A genetic double-cross that empowers women with the ability to bear children and reserves for men the right to be color-blind hemophiliacs.

ZOMBIE: A mirthless creature beloved by teenage horror movie fans and those in charge of the hiring at accounting firms.

Proud…

I’m proud of both my daughters. I was asked in an email how they’re doing, and since I seldom write about them, I figured once a year is about right…

OD (oldest daughter) has moved over to a new job at one of the big box outdoor stores and is now managing in-store displays. It’s keeping her VERY busy, but it’s a ‘good’ busy according to her. She likes the job, and has a chance to move up. #1 grandson is still growing (now 6’2″ or more) and playing summer basketball.

PP, well she’s been a tad busy too…

They did a ‘little’ move of a few patients for a hospital, HERE.  And #2 grandson is growing quickly…

Jace 8 9 15I’m up to my alligator in assholes this week, but I was able to get a beta read done for Daddybear. His new book will be coming out shortly, and I’m pretty sure folks will like it! I’m not going to steal his thunder though… 🙂

 

 

That was weird…

So the radio alarm goes off at 0600 this morning, and ‘something’ that was playing yanked my subconscious straight into the past…

I couldn’t get this scene out of my mind for some reason…

I grew up listening to him on XERF, 1570AM in the 60s, and he was on AFRTS up through the mid-70s.

He was the counter-culture icon, as he was always seen but not heard. I think American Graffiti was the first time most of us ever saw the face, but we sure as hell knew that voice… 🙂

Still trying to figure out what got me on this kick this morning. Now I’m hungry, more coffee is needed, and I guess sleeping in is a non-starter.

Sigh…

Bread and circuses…

And the politicrats are off and running… Two Pub debates yesterday, and I didn’t see a damn thing in either one (other than Fiorina) that impressed me…

While I applaude Fox for actually trying to get the candidates to actually answer questions, by the time it was over, all I could come up with were dog analogies…

AND a headache…

Rand Paul- Chihuahua

Christie- Bulldog

Trump- Irish Setter

Bush- Labrador

Do we REALLY have to listen to this crap for another 17 months???

Gah…

I dunno…

Buddy of mine over at NASA sent me this one…

NASA Deputy Administrator Lori Garver announced Jan. 16 a newly planned addition to the International Space Station that will use the orbiting laboratory to test expandable space habitat technology. NASA has awarded a $17.8 million contract to Bigelow Aerospace to provide a Bigelow Expandable Activity Module (BEAM), which is scheduled to arrive at the space station in 2015 for a two-year technology demonstration.

Full article is HERE.

I ‘think’ I’d have to be really confident of it before I went in there without an EVA suit on…

I know they do good work, but one big leak…

TBT…

So I’m at a friend’s house, and she comes out with this…

It’s a Ka-Bar… But…

Pal 1

It’s not a Ka-Bar… Or is it??? PAL? Pal 2

Yep, it’s actually a PAL Blade Co, USMC issued 1219C2 USMC Mark 2 Combat Knife!!!Pal 3

And it’s stamped PAL on one ricasso and USMC on the other…Pal 4

Ka-Bar info HERE.

Here’s a bit of history on PAL and this blade. Produced by the PAL Cutlery Company of Plattsburgh, NY. Pal was established in 1935 as a cutlery company, specializing in kitchen implements. The company was a merger of the Utica Knife & Razor Company of Utica, NY and the Pal Blade Company of Chicago, IL. Pal used both the “Blade Company” and “Cutlery Company” monikers interchangeably during the next two decades. During World War II the PAL Blade Company produced hundreds of thousands of edged weapons for the US war effort, including USN Mark 1 and Mark 2 knives, M-3 Trench Knives, TL-29 pocket knives, a variety of bayonets including the M-1 and M-4, as well as a limited number of USMC 1219C2 combat knives. The Pal Blade Company went out of business in 1953, and the assets of the company were acquired by American Safety Razor company.

Her dad was a Marine in WWII, and served at least some time in the Philippines and other places in SEA, but never talked about it. She’d never seen the knife either… It was found in the bottom of a trunk after he died. She’s done nothing to it, and it’s in excellent shape all things considered. I can’t help but wonder where the sand on the tang came from, and what the stain is on the sheath… Her dad had gone in to the Marines in 41, so this must have been an original issue knife, as it’s an early PAL with the red spacer below the pommel.

If only it could talk…

PSA!!!

Just got word on this one at work this morning… Be aware!!!

I want to bring your attention to a potentially dangerous phishing email that contains a malicious link.  If you received any email from any of these email addresses:

[email protected]

[email protected]

[email protected]

And the Subject Line is:  “Your USAA Account Computer/Device Preferences Notification.”

DO NOT OPEN the email.  DELETE THE EMAIL IMMEDIATELY.  Then DELETE the email from your Deleted Items folder.  The email contains a malicious link that can attack email and other Information Technology systems.

Posted in PSA

Where to retire, follow-up…

Well, after the response to my post on Sunday, I figured I owe y’all an explanation…

That was actually posted as a humorous post… Yes, I am retiring (again) the end of the year, but I’ve already decided where to relocate the bunker…

North/Panhandle Texas is my location of choice. Close to family (but not too close), and a friendly state toward military retirees and gun owners. I’m looking at a place out in the country, and am planning on scouting out/visiting a couple of locations in the next few months.

And NO STATE TAXES! 🙂

Oh yeah, and winters that aren’t too bad… I really don’t like cold weather, and have issues with frostbite from one of my military ‘excursions’ over the years (got frostbite on both hands and both feet).

Some folks were suggesting snowbirding, but realistically I can’t afford that unless I buy TWO tents. The books are selling, but not that well. And I’ve been through hurricanes/typhoons and also lived on the coast, and those have NO attraction for me. I don’t have anybody to take long walks on the beach with, and people tend to look at old men funny when they are walking the beach by themselves.  Just sayin…

So thanks to those who ‘suggested’ various areas, and offered beers. I hope to actually be able to take some time and road trips, so I’m going to try to take y’all up on that!

Can’t Legislate???

When in doubt, REGULATE…

Remember Cap and Trade? Obama’s promise to bankrupt the coal industry???

Go HERE. From 2008…

And then there was the ‘dump’ from yesterday on the ‘new’ EPA regs for 32% emissions reductions. The goals are even steeper than previously expected.

Go HERE to see the article and video. One of my co-workers IS a climatologist, she is ‘not’ impressed… Saying this will do nothing to actually reduce global emissions!!! And the costs of these new regulations have the potential to at least double our electricity rates, if not cause other extensive problems to the grid due to lack of backup power…

This one isn’t going to be pretty…

Fact Checking…

Also known as the ‘rest of the story’!!!

For years, gun control advocates have been peddling the claim that “40 percent of gun sales do not go through background checks.” Recently the claim has made its way into several news outlets, including the Las Vegas Sun, USA Today, and the New York Times. The claim that 40 percent of gun sales do not go through a federal background check is false and comes from a decades-old survey that has been widely debunked.

The REAL facts are below.

  • Media outlets including the Richmond Times-Dispatch and the Washington Post have concluded that this claim is false.  Washington Post gave the claim 3 out of 4 Pinochios for being way off target.
  • Most of the survey covered sales before there was a federal background check system.
  • The 1994 survey was conducted eight months after the Brady Act went into effect, mandating background checks on individuals seeking to buy firearms from federally licensed dealers. Survey participants were asked about their gun acquisitions going back two years. Some of the participants likely made gun purchases before the Brady Act, when they were not required to undergo federal background checks.
  • Self-reports are inherently unreliable – not actual data of sales.
  • Only a small group of gun owners — 251 people — answered the survey question about the origin of their weapons. Some of the gun owners were not sure how they had gotten their guns, answering “probably” or “probably not” on whether they got the gun from a licensed firearm dealer. 

That’s how many people, or how few they are using to extrapolate for the rest of us. Think about that… 251…

  • Additionally, the federal survey simply asked buyers if they thought they were buying from a licensed firearms dealer. While all Federal Firearm Licensees (FFLs) do background checks, only those perceived as being FFLs were counted. Yet, there is much evidence that survey respondents who went to the smallest FFLs, especially the “kitchen table” types, had no idea that the dealer was actually “licensed.” Many buyers seemed to think that only “brick and mortar” stores were licensed dealers, and so the survey underestimating the number of sales covered by the checks.
  • The researchers gave this number for all transactions, including gifts, not just “sales.” Count only guns that were bought, traded, borrowed, rented, issued as a job requirement or won through raffles, and 85 percent went through federally licensed gun dealers; just 15 percent would’ve been transferred without a background check.
  • Economist John Lott, the author of several landmark studies on the real-world impact of gun control, has concluded that if you take out transfers of guns either between FFLs or between family members, the remaining number of transfers falls to about 10 percent. Lott stated, “We don’t know the precise number today, but it is hard to believe that it is above single digits.” (http://www.buckeyefirearms.org/op-ed-truth-background-checks)

Facts on “how criminals get their guns”:

  • How criminals get guns—According to the Bureau of Justice Statistics, the vast majority of criminals in state prison for gun crimes get guns through theft, on the black market, from a drug dealer or “on the street.” Less than one percent get guns from gun shows.
  • Straw purchasers—According to the Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, Firearms and Explosives (BATFE), “The most frequent type of trafficking channel identified in ATF investigations is straw purchasing from federally licensed firearms dealers. Nearly 50 percent . . . .” Straw purchasers are people who pass background checks and buy guns for criminals, defeating the background check system.
  • Stolen guns—According to the BJS, “about 1.4 million guns, or an annual average of 232,400, were stolen during burglaries and other property crimes in the six-year period from 2005 through 2010.” The FBI’s stolen firearm file contained over 2 million reports as of March 1995. The BATFE has reported “Those that steal firearms commit violent crimes with stolen guns, transfer stolen firearms to others who commit crimes, and create an unregulated secondary market for firearms, including a market for those who are prohibited by law from possessing a gun.” Even gun control supporters have said, “approximately 500,000 guns are stolen each year from private citizens. . . . Obviously, these stolen guns go directly into the hands of criminals.” A study conducted by gun control supporters found that in 1994 “About 211,000 handguns and 382,000 long guns were stolen in noncommercial thefts that year, for a total of 593,000 stolen firearms.”

Stale, outdated facts, based on an extremely small sample size with an unknown confidence factor and questionable answers… Best case, +/-6.19% confidence interval based on a 50% accuracy…

To get a ‘valid’ sample, you’d need somewhere between 9600 and 38400 people. That actually would be usable, assuming 100,000,000 gun owners…

h/t NRA Media