Noise Complaint…



This is just frikkin HILARIOUS!!!  If you ever flew low-levels in the old days, you can appreciate BOTH sides of this one…  We ‘used’ to train like we were going to fight, now days, not so much…  All I can say is it’s a trip to fly UNDER a flight of Canadian Geese… 

Noise Complaint Lemoore Low Levels – PILOTS READ and HEED!!!!!
Leadership,

I normally don’t share these with you but find myself needing to send the message that we are being watched. While not uncommon this particular individual has been keep a log of our flying events for some time. I expect you all to be professional and to expect scrutiny. Our industry demands it.

Rabies’s note to me while lengthy is not uncommon. My staff and I see many of these each week as you and your warriors exercise your right to hone your skills on low level training routes and in controlled airspace in preparation to defend this great nation when called.

My response and reply are at the end of his complaint.

VR Mutha

—–Original Message—– Subject: Noise Complaint

Captain,

I am having an issue with noise that is generated by aircraft based at NAS Lemoore (and elsewhere), specifically, with their use of a low level military training route that your command is the controlling authority for. Rather than deal with mere underlings, I thought it best to go directly to the source of “where the buck stops”. That would be you.

My home is located in a rural area of California’s Sacramento Valley. I was unaware that when I purchased this home 21 years ago, it was located directly under the centerline of VR-201 (or VR-202, I can’t remember which one it is), at GPS coordinates NXX.X8.610 WXXX.X8.710, 210′ MSL (according to the GPS in my car). Over the last 21 years, I have been subjected to the repeated injustices, insults to my eardrums, and affronts to my sensibilities as an American Taxpayer, that your jets have been responsible for. In the early 90’s the use of this low level training route was frequent, but I tolerated it nonetheless. From about 1995 until early this year, use of this route was only occasional and sporadic, so I could generally overlook the issue. However, in the last three weeks, there has been a noticeable increase it its use. Specifically, I have observed the following,

1. August 30th, 1135 AM PDT – A single F-18

2. September 18th, 1430 PM PDT – A single EA-6B

3. September 19th, 1120 AM PDT – A single F-18

4. September 19th, 1145 AM PDT – A single F-18

Here is my specific complaint…..


1. None of these overflights were low enough…

2. None of these overflights were loud enough……

3. And, none of these overflights were fast enough!!!

As an American Taxpayer, I pay good, hard earned money, to provide your young Naval Aviators the best training possible. For that money, I EXPECT to get something for it. If my house is not shaken to its foundation, if the windows do not rattle in their frames, I judge this display of airmanship as incredibly weak. All of these jets listed above, were so high, that I could not tell if the Hornets were Super Hornets or Legacy Hornets (the Electic-6 was unmistakable). These jets were so high, that after one of them flew by, my wife looked at me and said, “That fly-by is so wimpy, you should call it a “Whisperjet”.

The ultimate goal is to earn a five-star rating, as viewed by me. To earn a five-star rating, your jets should create enough noise to break at least one window in the house. Not since ’92-’93 has that happened. At the time, a flight of eight jets in a combat spread formation passed over my house at about 200′ AGL, approximately 500+ knots. This flight consisted of four Hornets, two Intruders and two Turkeys. The thundering noise was awesome! Not only did I have to replace a few windows, but several of my neighbors did as well!! That was a fly-by truly worthy of Naval Aviators.

As a former naval Aviator (back in the day, we flew Lot V Hornets with planning link failures and collapsed landing gear), I am hugely embarrassed for my younger brethren. You and your young naval Aviators should be ashamed, for you have subjected me and my family to the indignity of these transgressions. My son, who is a KC-135 pilot in the Air Force has observed some these so-called “fly-bys”, and has said that even his jet makes more noise when it is at 5,000′ at cruise power settings.

As you know, to fly the American flag upside down is a sign of distress. Perhaps you should bring in the young Naval Aviators responsible for these affronts to our dignity, and instruct them to wear their Wings of Gold upside down on their flight suits the next time they visit the O’Club, as a sign of their humility and penance for committing these transgressions.

Very respectfully,

Rabies VFA-113 (circa ’87-’90)


Sent: Thursday,  Subject: RE: Noise Complaint

Rabies,

I assure you that this has my fullest attention. I have directed my Operation team to investigate these repeated injustices and to bring me the names of all the guilty parties. I am expecting to receive a briefing from my Operation Officer early next week. In the mean time I have asked my staff to review our SOP, route descriptions, and tactical training procedures to ensure we have the guidance in place to achieve the “The five-star rating”.

In fact, once we are complete with our investigation I personally plan to survey the route myself to ensure we have not overlooked any training opportunities and will encourage others to do so as well.

I firmly believe that if we do not use these training routes to their fullest we may in fact loose them all together. Thankfully, we have great Americans like you who remind us that there are still some that appreciate the “Sound of Freedom”. For that reminder I applaud your letter and tenacity to go directly to the top!

I would like to offer by way of apology an opportunity to re-blue the resonance of jet noise that will in fact shake you to the bone. If you and your wife would be my guest at our air show I would be honored. I have a limited number of VIP seats but would like to send you an invite to attend either Saturday the 15th or Sunday the 16th of October.

If you would be so kind to send me your address I will have an invitation in the mail in short order. Sir, it would be an honor to make your acquaintance.

Proud to Serve, Mutha

Commander Strike Fighter Wing Pacific


—–Original Message—– Subject: RE: Noise Complaint

Captain Mutha,

Thank you for your prompt and complete attention to this matter.

I am indeed encouraged and heartened by your rapid response to these past travesties. I am confident that your forcefulness in placing your hands firmly on the helm of this issue will pay dividends for all us… Your young aviators will get the training they truly deserve, the country will be better served by having the most competent aviators in the world, and I will get my “5 star rated” fly-bys. What more can we ask for?

Your leadership on this issue is exemplary, and is a credit to you and the Naval Service. I would be most pleased to favorably endorse your next FitRep accordingly, to ensure that the next promotion board is fully aware of your outstanding contribution to our country and the Naval Service.

If I may be of additional service, I will gladly assist your staff in any capacity as they pursue the work you have assigned them in reviewing this military training route. Even if the contribution is as small as providing occasional critiques of the aviator’s route performance (from the comfort of my lounge chair by the pool), I will answer the call.

Your offer to accommodate both my wife and I as your guests at the Lemoore air show is both gracious and generous, and is a sign of your stellar leadership. Accordingly, we humbly accept your offer with great gratitude. We would be honored to attend the air show on Saturday, 15 October.

We look forward to meeting you, and being a part of this great event.

Best regards,

“Rabies”

P.S. There is an answer to the above question, “What more can we ask for?”….. My wife says that attending this air show, with its “bone-shaking” jet noise, will hopefully, finally shut me up. She has had to tolerate the last 21 years in this house of my complaints about not enough jet noise and afterburners (on active duty, that need was satisfied by endless hours on the LSO platform on the Connie and Indy, and countless hours at the LSO shack out at NASL 32L). She has repeatedly stated that my complaints are louder than the jet noise, and she wants that changed.


Not saying that old military aviation types are just a ‘bit’ off or anything… 🙂

A Little ‘Humor’, Kinda Sorta…


NOAH TODAY


 In the year 2011, the Lord came unto Noah, who was now living in Oregon and said: “Once again, the earth has become evil and I see the end of all flesh before me. Build another Ark and save 2 of every living thing along with a few good humans.” He gave Noah the blueprints, saying: “You have 6 months to build the Ark before I will start the unending rain for 40 days and 40 nights.”

Six months later, the Lord looked down and saw Noah weeping in his yard – but no Ark. “Noah!,” He roared, “I’m about to start the rain! Where is the Ark?” “Forgive me, Lord,” begged Noah, “but things have changed.”

“I needed a Building Permit.”

 “I’ve been arguing with the Boat Inspector about the need for a sprinkler system.”

“My neighbors claim that I’ve violated the Neighborhood By-Laws by building the Ark in my back garden and exceeding the height limitations. We had to go to the Local Planning Committee for a decision.”
 

“Then the Local Council and the Electric Company demanded a boat load of money for the future costs of moving power lines and other overhead obstructions, to clear the passage for the Ark’s move to the sea. I told them that the sea would be coming to us, but they would hear nothing of it.”

 “Getting the wood was another problem. There’s a ban on cutting local trees in order to save the Greater Spotted Barn Owl. I tried to convince the environmentalists that I needed the wood to save the owls – but no go!”

 “When I started gathering the animals the ASPCA took me to court. They insisted that I was confining wild animals against their will. They argued the accommodations were too restrictive, and it was cruel and inhumane to put so many animals in a confined space.”

“Then the Environmental Protection Agency ruled that I couldn’t build the Ark until they’d conducted an environmental impact study on your proposed flood.”

“I’m still trying to resolve a complaint with the Human Rights Commission on how many minorities I’m supposed to hire for my building crew.”

“Immigration are checking the Visa status of most of the people who want to work.”

“The trades unions say I can’t use my sons. They insist I have to hire only Union workers with ark-building experience.”

“To make matters worse, the Internal Revenue Service seized all my assets, claiming I’m trying to leave the country illegally with endangered species.”

“So, forgive me, Lord, but it would take at least 10 years for me to finish this Ark.”

“Suddenly the skies cleared, the sun began to shine, and a rainbow stretched across the sky.”



Noah looked up in wonder and asked,
“You mean you’re not going to destroy the world?”

“No,” said the Lord. ” The Government beat me to it.”

An OUTSTANDING Rant…

Daddy Bear, like a lot of us, is totally fed up with the Occupy (whatever) and the media coverage…


He lets it all hang out HERE, and I’m applauding and agreeing! And he didn’t even resort to four letter words!!!


Go read, it’s worth the time, and I think you’ll find yourself nodding in agreement…

I’m one of them…

Grey-Haired Brigade

They like to refer to us as senior citizens, old fogies, geezers, and in some cases dinosaurs. Some of us are “Baby Boomers” getting ready to retire. Others have been retired for some time. We walk a little slower these days and our eyes and hearing are not what they once were.

We have worked hard, raised our children, worshipped our God and grown old together. Yes, we are the ones some refer to as being over the hill, and that is probably true. But before writing us off completely, there are a few things that need to be taken into consideration.

In school we studied English, history, math, and science which enabled us to lead America into the technological age. Most of us remember what outhouses were, many of us with firsthand experience. We remember the days of telephone party-lines, 25 cent gasoline, and milk and ice being delivered to our homes. For those of you who don’t know what an icebox is, today they are electric and referred to as refrigerators. A few even remember when cars were started with a crank. Yes, we lived those days.

We are probably considered old fashioned and out-dated by many. But there are a few things you need to remember before completely writing us off. We won World War II, fought in Korea and Viet Nam . We can quote The Pledge of Allegiance, and know where to place our hand while doing so. We wore the uniform of our country with pride and lost many friends on the battlefield. We didn’t fight for the Socialist States of America , we fought for the “Land of the Free and the Home of the Brave.” We wore different uniforms but carried the same flag. We know the words to the Star Spangled Banner, America , and America the Beautiful by heart, and you may even see some tears running down our cheeks as we sing. We have lived what many of you have only read about in history books and we feel no obligation to apologize to anyone for America .

Yes, we are old and slow these days but rest assured, we have at least one good fight left in us. We have loved this country, fought for it, and died for it, and now we are going to save it. It is our country and nobody is going to take it away from us. We took oaths to defend America against all enemies, foreign and domestic, and that is an oath we plan to keep. There are those who want to destroy this land we love but, like our founders, there is no way we are going to remain silent.                      

It was the young people of this nation who elected Obama and the Democratic Congress.

You fell for the “Hope and Change” which in reality was nothing but “Hype and Lies.”  You have tasted socialism and seen evil face to face, and have found you don’t like it after all.  You make a lot of noise, but most are all too interested in their careers or “Climbing the Social Ladder” to be involved in such mundane things as patriotism and voting.  Many of those who fell for the “Great Lie” in 2008 are now having buyer’s remorse.  With all the education we gave you, you didn’t have sense enough to see through the lies and instead drank the ‘Cool-Aid.’ Now you’re paying the price and complaining about it.  No jobs, lost mortgages, higher taxes, and less freedom.  This is what you voted for and this is what you got.  We entrusted you with the Torch of Liberty and you traded it for a paycheck and a fancy house. 

Well, don’t worry youngsters, the Grey Haired Brigade is here, and in 2012 we are going to take back our nation. We may drive a little slower than you would like but we get where we’re going, and in 2012 we’re going to the polls by the millions. This land does not belong to the man in the White House nor to the likes of Nancy Pelosi and Harry Reid. It belongs to “We the People” and “We the People” plan to reclaim our land and our freedom. We hope this time you will do a better job of preserving it and passing it along to our grandchildren.  So the next time you have the chance to say the Pledge of Allegiance, Stand up, put your hand over your heart, honor our country,  and thank God for the old geezers of the “Grey-Haired Brigade.”

~Author, Anon. Grey-Haired Brigade Member  

Aviators…

This was attributed to one of my former classmates in AOCS, he transferred over to the Air Force Reserves after his hitch in the Navy…


And if memory serves, it sounds like he hasn’t changed much…


In all honesty I have to say I agree with him 100%! Fighter pilots, and military aviators in general ARE NOT PC PEOPLE.  You can’t be and do your job well; you NEED an ego, and a lot of confidence in your ability to go into a fight and come out the winner.

The Old School

Written by Brigadier General Xxxxx, USAFR-Retired — a former Anchor-Clanker Navy Fighter Pilot who minces no words.  He tells it like it has become with the present day Air Force that is headed by Politically Correct Whoosies.

Some of you know that I was recently “retired” as the XXX Fighter Wing Commander. The decision was made by Brig Gen Xxxxx, the Xxxxx  Air Commander, who replaced me because he “just wants to change the culture at the XXXnd”. Not for cause or performance or any other reason. This officer never commanded anything bigger than an Air Control Squadron and somehow he wound up in charge. Heck, the guy probably got beat up in grade school everyday. I think it is indicative of what is happening in our Air Force and reinforces what Bruce MacLennan and the anonymous author have to say below. Well, I also have something to say about our changing Air Force and it’s quickly disappearing Fighter Pilot culture…

“How many scope dope drone operators does it take to change a lightbulb? Two. One to change the bulb, and one to kiss my ass. That’s right. I said kiss my ass. ‘Cause I’ve had it. The air superiority fighter and its PILOT are not dead and the Chinese are so far not impressed with drones.”

I am tired of Fighter Pilots suffering at the hands of all the pencil pushing REMFs and ladder climbing opportunists and shitty non-rated managers (who think they are leaders) just because the Air Force is currently more interested in feelings and sexual orientation than fighting. Not all officers have what it takes to lead warriors yet too many of them are in charge in our military. At this rate we may lose the next real war.

These shit bird officers need to be run out of leadership positions and get out of my face already. We have too many people in our military that feel the need to play political victim and go to court instead of just dealing with it themselves, no one can have any kind of fun anymore. Men and women can’t flirt, hug, look at anyone sideways, or drink beer out of mermaid mug because of you “victims” and your lawyers. Are you happy?

And while I’m at it… Fighter Pilots, who are willing to die so that we can have low prices at the gas pump and shop at the mall, should be able to throw the wildest parties they can manage without one uptight biddy coming in and stopping it. There were scads of women at The ’91 Tailhook party who were having the time of their lives, voluntarily being just as debauched as any of the men were. Everyone who flew a plane, or even knew someone who flew a plane, knew how wild those parties were and what went on. What does our society expect? A prayer service? It’s worse now than it was then.

“Victims” need to just throw some punches of their own whenever guys, gals, lesbos, or homos get out of line. Doesn’t our tax money go to teach all of our military how to fight? I’m not trying to make the idiotic “she had it coming” argument here, which would go something like “of course they grabbed her breasts, look how big they are.” Plus, just reaching out and grabbing some boob is wrong no matter what. When I was at Tailhook, even at our most drunken admin parties we never acted like that. No matter how hard I try I can’t think of an excuse good enough to do something like that. But it’s still nothing to lose a career over or get your panties in a wad.

Besides, fighter pilots are supposed to be aggressive assholes. That’s how we used to train them. I don’t know about you, but I don’t want a military of fighter pilots who are gifted at giving sensitivity seminars. I want mad-dog, rabid killers going to battle for me and mine. Man or woman. When our homeland is threatened by Middle-Eastern Muslim radicals, or when we want to force our form of government on some poor, unsuspecting poppy growing shit hole, or when uppity North Korean despots develop nuke weapons, I want to be able to call on men and women who like to fight and drink.

I want an officer who knows how to whack some drunk in the balls when he grabs her tits, not call a press conference and a lawyer. If you’re a wimp who doesn’t know how to find the exit at a rowdy party, go fly a kite, not a jet fighter. Fighter Pilot should always be capitalized because it is a hard earned title – So there. Perhaps it’s time for me to retire.


 “Mongo” 

And this one comes from JP, one hellva interesting set of circumstances surrounding these two WWII pilots…


You really CAN’T make stuff like this up…

Trigger time!!!


And my ritual humiliation… Sigh…


Met up with a friend at the range this morning to help him sight in a new Remington ADL in .270, after that, he drug me over to the shotgun range, and once again I got my butt beat not only on trap, but ALSO on skeet today…


And to add insult to injury, he brought along his son (VMI senior) and son’s buddy (VMI 2010).  I was shooting, er… TRYING to shoot the Citori, and I notice the furniture on the buddy’s gun looks kinda weird, so after the first round I asked him about it; turns out it’s one of THESE!  Now at this point he’s missed ONE bird out of the first round…


So we shoot another round of skeet, and I’m sucking hind tit as usual, but out of eight doubles in the two rounds, somehow I managed to hit six of them.  I got lucky on two and hit both birds with one shot, but what I can’t figure out is whyinhell I can’t hit a bird going straight away from me… sigh…


So we go over to the trap range, and shoot a round of trap, and I’m STILL bringing up the rear, and this kid cleans the trap too (out of 75 rounds he had 74 hits)!  Sitting in the club house over coffee, I find out, “Oh, I was on the rifle team for four years, started shooting trap and skeet when I was 12.” 


THEN he suggests trying to shoot with the middle finger rather than the index finger, since I’ve ‘trained’ myself not to ‘slap’ the trigger, and to always shoot the skeet choke tube.  I went back and looked at the shotgun and I was shooting full/improved for the two chokes… 


Stupid… Just plain stupid… sigh…


Guess I need to go get some more choke tubes.  Anybody else ever heard of shooting with your middle finger???



Another Day, Another Airplane Ride…



Thirty-six hours of travel for 16 hours worth of meetings.  I’m not doing ‘something’ right here.  Good trip though, productive and hopefully some positives will come out of it…  


In the I TRULY know I’m getting too old category, came out of a two day meeting on the second day, and had a individual come up to me and say, “My Dad says to tell you hello.” I’m standing there with a WTF? look on my face, and he whips out his cell and shows me a picture taken in 1973 with myself standing next to his dad in the picture.  Of course the obvious question is, HOWINTHEHELL did you recognize me??? Turns out I was over at their house years ago and his son remembered me…


And called his dad, who sent him the picture and a ‘suitable’ comment, which of course I returned…


In honor of the ‘good ol’ days’, The Seabag!!!



There was a time when everything you owned had to fit in your seabag. Remember those nasty rascals? Fully packed, one of the suckers weighed more than the poor devil hauling it. The damn things weighed a ton and some idiot with an off-center sense of humor sewed a carry handle on it to help you haul it. Hell, you could bolt a handle on a Greyhound bus but it wouldn’t make the damn thing portable. The Army, Marines, and Air Force got footlockers and WE got a big ole’ canvas bag. 

After you warped your spine jackassing the goofy thing through a bus or train station, sat on it waiting for connecting transportation and made folks mad because it was too damn big to fit in any overhead rack on any bus, train, and airplane ever made, the contents looked like hell. All your gear appeared to have come from bums who slept on park benches. Traveling with a seabag was something left over from the “Yo-ho-ho and a bottle of rum” sailing ship days. Sailors used to sleep in hammocks, so you stowed your issue in a big canvas bag and lashed your hammock to it, hoisted it on your shoulder and, in effect, moved your entire home from ship to ship.

I wouldn’t say you traveled light because with ONE strap it was a one shoulder load that could torque your skeletal frame and bust your ankles.

It was like hauling a dead linebacker.


They wasted a lot of time in boot camp telling you how to pack one of the suckers. There was an officially sanctioned method of organization that you forgot after ten minutes on the other side of the gate at Great Lakes or San Diego.

You got rid of a lot of the ‘issue’ gear when you went to a SHIP.  Did

you EVER know a tin-can sailor who had a raincoat? A flat hat? One of those nut-hugger knit swimsuits? How bout those ‘roll-your-own’ neckerchiefs… the ones girls in a good Naval tailor shop would cut down & sew into a ‘greasy snake’ for two bucks?

Within six months, EVERY fleet sailor was down to ONE set of dress blues, port & starboard, undress blues, and whites, a couple of white hats, boots, shoes, a watch cap, assorted skivvies, a pea coat, and three sets of bleached-out dungarees.

The rest of your original issue was either in the pea coat locker, lucky bag, or had been reduced to wipe-down rags in the paint locker. Underway ships were NOT ships that allowed vast  accumulation of private gear.

Hobos who lived in discarded refrigerator crates could amass greater

loads of pack-rat crap than fleet sailors. The confines of a

canvas-back rack, side locker, and a couple of bunk bags did NOT allow one to live a Donald Trump existence.

Space and the going pay scale combined to make us envy the lifestyle of a mud-hut Ethiopian. We were global equivalents of nomadic Mongols without ponies to haul our stuff.

And after the rigid routine of boot camp, we learned the skill of random compression, known by mothers world-wide as ‘cramming’. It is amazing what you can jam into a space no bigger than a bread-box if you pull a watch cap over a boot and push it with your foot.

Of course, it looks kinda weird when you pull it out, but they  NEVER hold fashion shows at sea and wrinkles added character to a ‘salty’ appearance.

There was a four-hundred mile gap between the images on recruiting

posters and the ACTUAL appearance of sailors at sea. It was NOT without justifiable reason that we were called the tin-can Navy.

We operated on the premise that if ‘Cleanliness was next to Godliness’ we must be next to the other end of that spectrum…

We looked like our clothing had been pressed with a waffle iron and
packed by a bulldozer. But what in hell did they expect from a bunch of swabs that lived in a crew’s hole of a 2100 Fletcher Class can? After awhile you got used to it… You got used to everything you owned picking up and retaining that distinctive aroma… You got used to old ladies on busses taking a couple of wrinkled nose sniffs of your pea coat, then getting and finding another seat.

Sometimes, I look at all the crap stacked in my garage and home, close my eyes and smile, remembering a time when EVERYTHING I owned could be crammed into that one canvas bag…

Now to try to get back on East Coast time… sigh…

Bait… It’s what’s for Dinner (Again)



Got drug over to Hayama on Sagami Bay for more sushi tonight.  This little place was truly a hole in the wall, 8 seats all at the bar, no tables, and pretty close to the waterfront.  Two older guys running the place, and I ‘think’ a grandson was the ‘runner’… 


No menu (or at least I never saw one), and absolutely NO Engrish was spoken… In other words, I was at the mercy of the folks I was with…


It was all good, until they did a round of eel, and I just couldn’t handle that one 🙁


Totally different quality from the Sushi Go Round, and it was damn expensive by comparison!!! $750 (roughly) for six people, but I do have to admit I was stuffed!!!


And the kid got sent somewhere for desert, and came back with an interesting little ‘dish’ that was a lemon custard, topped with fresh strawberries, and some kind of chocolate sauce drizzled over that!!! That was truly a great desert, but no way in hell to get the recipe or even confirm what I was eating…LOL


Off to bed, back to the airport am tomorrow, and 12-13 hours later land back home an hour before I take off…


Sorry for the lack of posts, and lack of comments, I’ll be commenting more when I get back this weekend.

On the Road (again)…



A little humor, considering I spent 13 1/2 hours on an airplane today…


ATC: Alitalia 321, continue taxi to the holding position 20R south via tango. Check for workers along taxiway.
 
Alitalia 321: Roger, 20R via tango. Workers checked, all are working.
_____________
 
Tower: “Delta 351, you have traffic at 10 o’clock, 6 miles!”
Delta 351: “Give us another hint! We have digital watches!”
_______________
Control tower to aircraft that just landed – “Bear right, next intersection”
 
Pilot – “Roger, we have him in sight”
 _______________
 
A student pilot became lost during a solo cross-country flight. While attempting to locate the aircraft on radar, ATC asked, “What was your last known position?”  
 
Student: “When I was number one for takeoff”.
____________
 
ATC – “Cessna XXX, What are your intentions? “
 
Cessna pilot – “To get my Commercial Pilots License and Instrument Rating.”
 
ATC – “I meant in the next five minutes not years.”
______________
 
A student pilot called in and said he was unsure of his position but he had a town in sight. Since we didn’t have him on radar, the controller told him to descend and look for the town’s water tower, see what it said on the side, climb back up and tell him.
Sure enough in about 3 minutes the pilot called back and said, “Approach, I found the water tower”.
The controller, feeling rather pleased, asked “And what did it say on the side?” The pilot replied, “It said Central High Seniors -1978”.
____________
 
Pilot – Outer marker, inbound.
 
Tower – Roger, cleared to land runway 36, winds 270 at 21, gusting 29, heavy rain, severe turbulence below 300, RVR 2,000 feet.
 
Pilot – Roger–cleared to land–and oh, let us know if it gets any worse.
 
Tower – WORSE?!!!
________________ 
 
Tower: “Aircraft on final, go around, aircraft on runway.”
 
Solo Student Pilot: “Roger” (Continues descent.)
 
Tower: “Aircraft, GO AROUND”
 
Student: “Roger”
(Continues descent)
 
Tower: (Screaming) “AIRCRAFT, GO AROUND!! GO AROUND!!”
 
Student: “Roger” (Continues descent.)
 
So, the student pilot plunks his airplane down on the numbers, taxies up to where the twin is sitting in the middle of the runway, GOES AROUND it, and continues on to the taxiway.
__________
Pilot:  “Approach, Cessna 123, request two practice ILS approaches, followed by the published missed to the VOR to hold, a VOR approach, two NDB approaches, and an ASR approach.”
 
Approach: “Cessna 123 squawk 4753 and would you like fries with that, sir?”
__________
Airliner: Approach, what’s our sequence?
 
Approach: Aircraft calling for the sequence, I missed your call-sign, but if I find out what it is, you’re last.

236 Years Young…

Happy Birthday NAVY!!! 236 years, and actually a bit of progress…  

NAVADMIN 306/11

MSGID/GENADMIN/CNO WASHINGTON DC/N00/OCT//

SUBJ/NAVY BIRTHDAY 2011//

RMKS/1. ON 13 OCTOBER, THE NAVY CELEBRATES 236 YEARS OF ENDURING TRADITIONS
AND MISSIONS THAT HAVE PRESERVED FREEDOM OF THE SEAS AND THE AMERICAN WAY OF
LIFE. AS WE CELEBRATE THIS BIRTHDAY, WE CAN REFLECT ON MORE THAN TWO
CENTURIES OF WARFIGHTING EXCELLENCE WHILE SERVING AS A GLOBAL FORCE FOR GOOD.
THE METTLE AND TENACITY OF THAT FLEDGLING FIGHTING FORCE ENDURES TODAY IN THE
MEN AND WOMEN SERVING OUR NAVY AND NATION.

2. OUR 200 YEAR HERITAGE IS STILL APPARENT TODAY. AS IT WAS IN 1775, OUR
PRIMARY JOINT PARTNER IS THE U.S. MARINE CORPS, AND OUR FOCUS IS "WARFIGHTING
FIRST". IT IS WHAT OUR NAVY DOES BEST, AND IT WILL CONTINUE TO BE OUR
PRIORITY. SIMILARLY, WE HAVE TO "OPERATE FORWARD" PROVIDING OUR NATION WITH
CRITICAL OFFSHORE OPTIONS AND BRINGING VITAL SECURITY AND STABILITY TO
MARITIME CROSSROADS AROUND THE WORLD. FINALLY, AS HISTORY HAS SO OFTEN TAUGHT
US, WE MUST "BE READY" TO ADDRESS ANY CHALLENGES, MANY OF WHICH WILL BE
UNEXPECTED.
THROUGH ALL THIS, IT IS OUR SAILORS' FIGHTING SPIRIT THAT WILL CONTINUE TO
ENSURE OUR SUCCESS.

3. OUR LONG AND ILLUSTRIOUS HISTORY MAKES CLEAR THAT WE CAN OVERCOME ANY
OBSTACLE, SEIZE ANY OPPORTUNITY, AND ULTIMATELY PREVAIL NO MATTER HOW
DIFFICULT THE CHALLENGES WE FACE. AS A RESULT OF UNWAVERING CONTRIBUTIONS OF
EVERY MEMBER OF OUR NAVY TEAM - OUR SAILORS, OUR CIVILIANS, OUR RESERVISTS,
OUR NAVY VETERANS, AND OUR FAMILIES AT HOME, WE ARE THE FINEST MARITIME FORCE
THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN.

4. AS OUR BIRTHDAY IS CELEBRATED AROUND THE GLOBE, I KNOW YOU WILL CARRY OUR
PROUD LEGACY WHEREVER YOU GO. I CANNOT BEGIN TO TELL YOU HOW HONORED AND
PRIVILEGED I AM TO BE YOUR CHIEF OF NAVAL OPERATIONS.
HAPPY 236TH BIRTHDAY TO YOU AND TO YOUR FAMILIES.

5. RELEASED BY ADMIRAL GREENERT, CHIEF OF NAVAL OPERATIONS.//