It’s almost time…

Posted on by January 28, 2018

To hit the golf course…

These laws were given to me by an old friend who carried has them around in his golf bag for, judging by the age of the paper (and his golf bag), decades.  True golfers should understand the words layed out here.

LAW 1: No matter how bad your last shot was, the worst is yet to come.  This law does not expire on the 18th hole, since it has the supernatural tendency to extend over the course of a tournament, a summer and, eventually, a lifetime.

LAW 2: Your best round of golf will be followed almost immediately by your worst round ever.  The probability of the latter increases with the number of people you tell about the former.

LAW 3: Brand new golf balls are water-magnetic.  Though this cannot be proven in the lab, it is a known fact that the more expensive the golf ball, the greater its attraction to water.

LAW 4: Golf balls never bounce off of trees back into play.  If one does, the tree is breaking a law of the universe and should be cut down.

LAW 5: No matter what causes a golfer to muff a shot, all his playing partners must solemnly chant “You looked up,” or invoke the wrath of the universe.

LAW 6: The higher a golfer’s handicap, the more qualified he deems himself as an instuctor.

LAW 7: Every par-three hole in the world has a secret desire to humiliate golfers.  The shorter the hole, the greater its desire.

LAW 8: Topping a 3-iron is the most painful torture known to man.

LAW 9: Palm trees eat golf balls.

LAW 10: Sand is alive.  If it isn’t, how do you explain the way it works against you?

LAW 11: Golf carts always run out of juice at the farthest point from the clubhouse.

LAW 12: A golfer hitting into your group will always be bigger than anyone in your group.  Likewise, a group you accidentally hit into will consist of a football player, a professional wrestler, a convicted murderer and an IRS agent—or some similar combination.

LAW 13: All 3-woods are domon-possessed.

LAW 14: Golf balls from the same “sleeve” tend to follow one another, particularly out of bounds or into the water (see Law three)

LAW 15: A severe slice is a thing of awesome power and beauty.

LAW 16: “Nice lag” can usually be translated to “lousy putt.”  Similarly, “tough break” can usually be translated “way to miss an easy one, sucker.”

LAW 17: The person you would most hate to lose to will always be the one who beats you.

LAW 18: The last three holes of a round will automatically adjust your score to what it really should be.

LAW 19: Golf should be given up at least twice per month.

LAW 20: All vows taken on a golf course shall be valid only until the sunset of the same day.

I’m head down in editing, WHICH I HATE, so commenting will be light and so will posting this week… Grrrr…

Lies, lies, and statistics…

Posted on by January 28, 2018

Two articles caught my attention yesterday. One was from the Free Beacon, about school shootings-

That count, created by Everytown for Gun Safety, claims there have been 11 school shootings thus far in 2018. However, nearly all of the incidents included alongside the Marshall County shooting bear little or no resemblance to that shooting or other well-publicized school shootings, like those at Sandy Hook Elementary or Columbine High School. None of the other events included in the gun-control group’s count feature more than one injury, most featured no injuries at all, and one involved a BB gun being shot at a school bus window.

Full article, HERE.

Another one is from the NRA, about the VPC-

Last week, the Violence Policy Center shared their analysis of 2016 fatal injury statistics, which are released by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention and available for public analysis. VPC’s headline: HERE. 

The full article HERE, from the NRA.

It’s amazing what happens when you look at ALL the data, not just cherry picking what floats your boat! The left has a habit of skewing data to match their preconceived notion of what ‘they’ believe is the truth. Sadly, very few folks ever look at ALL the data to get an actual (bigger) picture of what the data says. I’m firmly convinced they count on that, especially with the younger generations that do ‘sound bites’, and don’t bother to look beyond the surface.

This is much like the climate debate, where they are trying to skew RAW data, or hide it completely, since it doesn’t match their agenda.

Sigh…

Sigh…

Posted on by January 26, 2018

Those who do not read/study history…

Selfies are NOT a new thing… They didn’t start with the advent of digital cameras/cellphones…

Care to guess what year the ‘first’ selfie was taken?

And another question- What iconic car debuted today in 1965?

Continue reading →

Done!!!

Posted on by January 25, 2018

101,000 words. The draft will be going out this weekend to the alpha readers.

And here’s a first look at a possible cover. Tina did another great job!

PSA…

Posted on by January 24, 2018

REAL ID Act of 2005: Impact On Driver License Use as Security ID

If you’re planning to fly you may not be able to use your driver’s license as a form of identification to get through security. Also, its use in accessing Federal facilities
inclusive of military bases or entering nuclear power plants. That’s thanks to the REAL ID Act of 2005, which everyone in the travel industry is hoping you – and the other 719
million passengers who fly domestically every year – have heard about. The law, a counterterrorism measure that followed 9/11, calls for states to issue driver’s licenses with more security features – such as scannable bar codes and digital photos. They will be required for people to board any commercial flight and enter federal facilities and military bases.

Passports or other approved forms of federal identification- such as a border-crossing card, U.S. military ID, TSA Pre- Check or Global Entry card – can be used as an alternative.

Other alternative ID that will be accepted by TSA is listed at https://www.tsa.gov/travel/security-screening/identification. You will need this alternative ID if you live in one of 24 states that have yet to add the security measures to the driver’s licenses they issue. And you may need to get a new, updated license if you live in one of the states that already offers them. Enforcement began on January 22.
You can check your state’s status on the Department of Homeland Security website’s interactive map at https://www.dhs.gov/real-id. Some states have been granted
extensions to make their licenses compliant.

“It’s very complicated,” admits Katy Lloyd, spokesperson for the Virginia Department of Motor Vehicles. Virginia has been granted a REAL ID extension until Oct. 10, 2018,
when the state plans to have compliant licenses ready. Until then, residents can get through security using the driver’s licenses they already have. Delays are caused at least in part by the controversy over the legislation. Its opponents include some legislators who have called it an “unfunded mandate” that is too expensive to implement. Many states have repealed or are repealing those laws. While they are working on new compliant driver’s licenses, they also plan to offer unenhanced licenses as an option to
residents. The bottom line: You don’t want to find yourself barred from flying because you didn’t realize your old-school license is no longer an acceptable form of identification. If your state doesn’t have the new IDs, there is still time to get a passport or apply for another ID, says Tom Spagnola, senior vice president of supplier relations at the online travel agency CheapOair. Spagnola says airlines, not to mention airport security agents, don’t want to face a slew of angry and confused travelers when enforcement begins. Many in the travel industry are working overtime to inform the public, so he’s hopeful the message will get through.

Humor…

Posted on by January 23, 2018

Tired of the BS in the news, so you get humor… 🙂

The following is not intended to offend fans of tennis, basketball, football, or baseball.  It is, rather, an attempt to put everything in its proper perspective.  Ever wonder why golf is growing in popularity and why people who don’t even play go to tournaments or watch it on TV?  The following truisms may shed some light:

Golfers don’t have some of their players in jail every week.

Golfers don’t kick dirt on, or throw bottles at other people.

Professional golfers are paid in diret proportion to how well they play.

Golfers don’t hold out for more money, or demand new contracts, because of another player’s deal.

Professional golfers don’t demand that the taxpayers pay for the courses on which they play.

When golfers make a mistake, nobody is there to cover for them or back them.

The PGA raises more money for charity in one year than the NFL does in two years.

You can watch the best golfers in the world up close, at any tournament, including the majors, all day every day for $25-$35.

Even in the nose-bleed section, a ticket to the Super Bowl will cost you over $300—or $1000 from a scalper.

Golfers keep their clothes on while they are being interviewed.

Golf doesn’t have free agency.  In their prime, Palmer, Norman, and other stars would shake your hand and say they were happy to meet you.  In his prime, Jose Canseco wore T-shirts that read “Leave Me Alone”.

You can hear birds chirping on the golf course during a tournament.

At a golf tournament (unlike at taxpayer-funded sports stadia and arenas), you won’t hear a steady stream of four letter words and nasty name calling while you’re hoping that no one spills beer on you.

Golf courses don’t ruin the neighborhood.

 ++++++++++++++++

     Here’s a little slice of golf history that you might enjoy.  Why do golf courses have 18 holes, not 20 or 10 or an even dozen?

     During discussion among the club’s membership board at St. Andrews in 1858, a senior member pointed out that it takes exactly 18 shots to polish off a fifth of Scotch.  By limiting himself to only one shot of Scotch per hole, the Scot figured a round of golf was finished when the Scotch ran out!

+++++++++++++++++

      During his physical, the doctor asked the patient about his daily activity level.  He described a typical day: “Well, yesterday afternoon, I waded along the edge of a lake, drank eight beers, escaped from wild dogs in the heavy brush, jumped away from an aggressive rattlesnake, marched up and down several rocky hills, stood in a patch of poison ivy, crawled out of quicksand, and took four leaks behind big trees.”

     Inspired by the story, the doctor said, “You sound like one heck of an outdoors man!”

     ”Nah, he replied, I’m just a $#!++y golfer.”

+++++++++++++++

      My boss phoned me today. He said, “Is everything okay at the office?”

     I said, “It is all under control.  It’s been a very busy day. I haven’t stopped to take a break all day.”       

     “Can you do me a favor?” he asked.    

     I said, “Of course, what is it?”

     “Pick up the pace a little. I’m in the foursome behind you.”

Enjoy!!! Spring is just around the corner (and down the street, and…)

Well, well, well…

Posted on by January 22, 2018

Isn’t THAT speshul…

And really ‘curious’, that five months worth of texts between Fibbies Strzok and Page from, Dec 17, 2016 and May 17, 2017 are missing…

The Justice Department acknowledged the lapse in records in turning over 384 pages of new text messages between Strzok and Page, who were romantically involved, to congressional committees.

Article, HERE.

I can only ‘wonder’ what other text and email messages are missing from the Fibbies servers…

And then there is THIS, from the NSA, apparently, they ‘inadvertently’ destroyed data pertaining to lawsuits, not once, not twice, but THREE times backup tapes were deleted in 2009, 2011, and 2016!

Sigh…

This whole mess is starting to quack like a duck!

I gotta brag…

Posted on by January 21, 2018

On one of my friends…

12 years, 5200 hours (conservatively), and a VERY patient wife…

He designed and fabricated the dash and center console, plus the wiring harness, and that was just the start of it!

Designed the stereo system and installed/wired it.

Built the engine and designed the installation.

Over 500 hours of sanding on the body.

And a show winner the first time out!!!

He literally did EVERYTHING from design and assembly including body work, engine design and assembly, drive line suspension, interior, frame, brakes, AC, exhaust, fuel, electrical, cooling, stereo, etc.

1933 3 window coupe 3” chopped and frenched with suicide doors, Ford 351W 430 HP 430 FTLbs, Tremec 3550 manual, leather interior and trunk, chromed grille, mirrors, headlights, taillights, and windshield surround, AC, PB, Manual steering, Power Windows, Power trunk, wipers, 8 speaker stereo, 4 wheel disc brakes, 4 link 9” rear 3.73 ratio

Yes, he is a ‘tad’ anal retentive, but it paid off… Proud of you Brian, and Kim for putting up with your ‘obsession’ !!!

F**kers…

Posted on by January 20, 2018

Well, the Dems shut the government down over DACA, and their refusal to fund the wall…

Screen cap from C-SPAN says it all…

If this isn’t a clusterf**k, I don’t know what is. I’m guessing Trump broke it off in Chuckie’s ass Friday, when Chuckie didn’t stop and crow to the TV cameras about the ‘deal’ he’d cut.

But what really pisses me off, is the folks that can LEAST afford to be without paychecks, like the military and LEOs get shafted while the congresscritters, judges, and the President continue to get paid. Reference, HERE.

The ones that LEAST need the money, gah…

If this crap isn’t a poster child for Term Limits and recalls, I don’t know what is. I’d start with recalls on McConnell, Flake, Graham, Lee and Paul, and go from there. Either that or make them change to Dem, because that is what they really are. Had they voted FOR the CR, the shutdown would not have happened.

There is NO reason for any person to do more than two terms in congress, because they stop representing the constituents, and start making sure they will be re-elected, kowtowing to the lobbyists for money, selling their votes for ‘deals’ that benefit them personally, etc.

Of course the WAPO gleefully published THIS in 2016, when then candidate Trump talked about term limits.

Sounds to me like it’s time for the silent majority to step up again!

Kicking the soapbox back in the corner, and looking for my BP meds… Sigh…

Book pimping!!!

Posted on by January 19, 2018

Lawdog’s book is now available on Audible!

click on the cover to go to the link.

The blurb-

LawDog had the honor of representing law and order in the Texas town of Bugscuffle as a Sheriff’s Deputy, where he became notorious for, among other things, the famous Case of the Pink Gorilla Suit. In THE LAWDOG FILES, he chronicles his official encounters with everything from naked bikers, combative eco-warriors, suicidal drunks, respectful methheads, prison tattoo artists, and creepy children to six-foot chickens and lethal chihuahuas.

And I’m down to the final chapter on the 5th Grey Man, and looking at potential covers. I’m getting close to getting this out to the Alpha readers, hopefully before the end of the month.