More bad puns…

I don’t write ’em, I just send ’em along on recycled electrons…

A man’s home is his castle, in a manor of speaking

Dijon vu – the same mustard as before

Practice safe eating – always use condiments

Shotgun wedding – A case of wife or death

A man needs a mistress just to break the monogamy

A hangover is the wrath of grapes

Dancing cheek-to-cheek is really a form of floor play

Does the name Pavlov ring a bell?

Condoms should be used on every conceivable occasion

Reading while sunbathing makes you well red

When two egotists meet, it’s an I for an I

A bicycle can’t stand on its own because it is two tired

What’s the definition of a will? It’s a dead give away

Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana

In democracy your vote counts. In feudalism your count votes

She was engaged to a boyfriend with a wooden leg but broke it off

A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion

If you don’t pay your exorcist, you get repossessed

With her marriage, she got a new name and a dress

The man who fell into an upholstery machine is fully recovered

You feel stuck with your debt if you can’t budge it

Local Area Network in Australia – the LAN down under

Every calendar’s days are numbered

A lot of money is tainted -Taint yours and taint mine

A boiled egg in the morning is hard to beat

He had a photographic memory that was never developed

A midget fortune-teller who escapes from prison is a small medium at large

Once you’ve seen one shopping center, you’ve seen a mall

Bakers trade bread recipes on a knead-to-know basis

Santa’s helpers are subordinate clauses

Acupuncture is a jab well done

And you know you’re in a bad neighborhood when…

blackbird

Aviation Art…

6

August 1944, RAF HawkerTyphoons of 247 Squadron, armed with rockets and 20mm cannon launch a series of devastating attacks against the German Seventh Army and Fifth Panzer Army in the Falaise Gap. The German units had been almost completely surrounded by advancing allied ground forces, and contained within an area bounded by the four towns of Trun, Argentan, Vimoutiers and Chambois near Falaise. The Germans began their retreat by the only remaining route, through the Falaise Gap, whereupon the allies began a sustained air assault in an attempt to prevent their escape, and with deadly results. On a single day the Typhoons would destroy 175 German tanks.

Bleg…

Gunsmith Joe called me about 2230 last night, there had been a fire in his complex, and he’d caught a dog that had jumped from the third floor to escape the flames. The dog survived and Joe had taken him to the vet.

The dog (Hank), survived! Burnt, cut and apparently with a few broken bones from the fall, and the only thing his neighbor Chris had that survived.

There is a GoFundMe that Joe started to help pay for the medical care for the Pup. Click on the picture to go help if you can. It would be appreciated, also, if other bloggers would boost the signal that would be appreciated too!

Hank Chris go fund me

Thanks in advance…

Edit- Joe called me and Hank didn’t make it. Sadly, he passed away around lunch time. But the bill is still going to have to be paid. Thank you to all that have donated and boosted the signal!

 

It’s getting ugly early…

Trump rally in Chicago was cancelled over ~1000 protesters showing up and starting fights, report HERE and HERE.

I have no doubt this was ‘orchestrated’ by SEIU, Move On, BLM and who knows who else… I also saw some Bernie signs in the various coverage.

I just wonder who’s paying them?

The Dems, the Pub elites? Cruz or Rubio, or Clinton? Or administration ‘agents’ (after all it IS Chiraq)… Who???

This on the heels of Michelle Fields, a Breitbart reporter claiming she was manhandled by Trump’s campaign manager… HERE. Of note, it appears she used a Washington Post reporter’s ID of the person, and didn’t actually ‘see’ who grabbed her. Video shows two men who look very similar, but nothing can actually be determined as to who did what…

IF the violence keeps escalating, I can’t help but wonder if we’re going to see an assassination attempt. It is beginning to seem like nothing is off the table in these races.

The Grey Man, update to the tease…

After I asked for input last week, I got an email yesterday asking curiously what changes I’d made.

So, you get to see the sausage getting made, at least from the way ‘I’ write. Here is the revision to Back on Patrol that I made based on various comments I’ve received. Having said that, this still hasn’t been through the alpha and beta readers, and an editor yet, but I hope this gives y’all and idea of what I do with the inputs…

Back on Patrol

Jesse pulled into the sheriff’s department parking lot a little after seven, got her bag out of the car, and looped her duty belt over her shoulder.  Walking slowly to the back door, she sighed and unconsciously straightened her shoulders and tugged at her shirt and pants. Okay, ordering new pants is high on the list. I’m not as skinny as I used to be. I’ve done this before. It’s not like this is anything new. Back in the saddle. I can ride this horse.

Jesse walked in and was surprised to see both the sheriff and Johnny Hart standing there, “Good morning Sheriff, Johnny. What’s up?”

Sheriff Rodriquez said, “Morning Jesse, since you haven’t been out in a while, I figured it would be a good idea to give you a little refresher. Ortiz called in sick, and Johnny came in to pick up a shift. Since Johnny is our FTO[1] I can kill two birds with one stone so to speak.”

Deputy Hart said, “Let’s not use the word kill there Sheriff!” Turning to Jesse he said, “It’ll give you a chance to get back in the swing of things, without having to jump in the deep end to start with. Besides, more eyes mean more things to find. Not that I expect us to find anything.”

Jesse laughed, “Okay, no killing and no jumping in the deep end with all this equipment on. I’m good with that. I’m sure we’ll find something or other!”

The sheriff continued, “Y’all have sector two, she’s all yours Johnny. And with that, I’m outta here. Don’t call me unless you have to.” With a wave, he was out the back door, leaving Jesse and Hart standing looking at each other.

“What do you want me to do?” Jesse asked.

Hart replied, “Do the standard checks, and you’re driving. We’ve got two-one-four assigned to us.”

Jesse geared up, checked the boards for any wants, warrants, stolen vehicles and noted the license numbers, and picked a stack of BOLOs out of the box. Sticking her head in dispatch, she got a quick radio check on her handheld radio, and then walked out to the car. Jesse did the walk around, checked the lights and siren were operating correctly, and checked that the shotgun was cruiser ready. Digging in the driver’s side map pocket, she found the tuning fork, thumped it, and held it in front of the radar antenna. Noting the speed, she logged the calibration in the duty log and dropped it back in the map pocket. They loaded their duty bags in the trunk and Jesse said, “Okay let’s do this.”

Hart nodded, “You’re in charge. I’m just along for the ride and the OT today Jesse!”

Jesse rolled her eyes, “Whatever,” she said with a laugh. “Dispatch, two-fourteen in service, sector two.”

Dispatch replied, “Ten-four, two-fourteen.”

***

Four hours into the shift, Jesse and Hart had exhausted the catch up conversation, and Hart was slouched down in the passenger’s seat, “How about lunch? There’s a decent burger joint that opened not too long ago in Sheffield.”

Jesse replied, “Sounds good, I could go for a burger!” She turned onto I-10 and headed for Sheffield, until the radio went off on county-wide.

“All units, sectors two, three, four; domestic at westbound rest area mile three-oh-eight. Blue and white RV, back right corner of the parking area. Called in by observer, stating screaming and banging coming from RV.”

Jesse looked over at Hart, who shrugged, picking up the mic she said, “Dispatch, two-fourteen, we’re flipping at mile three-ten. ETA two minutes. Backup?”

Jesse heard cars two-oh-two and two-oh-seven say they were coming but ten and twenty minutes away. As they got close to the rest area, Jesse killed the overheads and eased slowly into the rest area, seeing only one blue RV. It was a big one, and she pulled in directly behind it, blocking it in. As they exited the car, they could hear crying, and the sounds of objects being thrown.

Hart pointed to the right side, and motioned Jesse to the left, Jesse cleared the left side and front of the RV, but all the shades were pulled.  As she came around the RV, she saw Hart, Taser drawn, standing to one side of the door. She sidled down the RV, took position on the back side of the door and nodded to Hart.

Banging on the door, Hart yelled, “Sheriff’s department. Open the door.” They heard one more crash and as Hart started to yell again, the door was opened by a large man in shorts, tennis shoes and nothing else, with disheveled hair and a cut over his eye.

Hart held the door saying, “Sir, would you step out here, please? We have a report of some loud noises and we just heard something breaking as we walked up.”

The man growled, “Ain’t none of your damn business!” and started pulling the door closed.

Hart didn’t let the door go and said mildly, “Sir, we really need you to step out here and talk with us.”

Jesse stepped around the door, backing Hart up, “Sir, please step down here!”

The man started trying to wrestle the door out of Hart’s hand, and Jesse saw a woman slumped on the floor behind the man. Holstering her Taser, she grabbed the door and yanked it, unbalancing the man and breaking his hold on the door, “Female down behind him, Johnny.”

Hart grabbed the man’s hand in a pain compliance grip and pulled him down out of the RV, as Jesse charged in. Jesse found a middle aged female on hands and knees, blood dripping from her face. Looking around, she saw broken crockery, dishes and multiple things strewn about. She grabbed what appeared to be a clean towel off the counter top and dropped to a knee, “Ma’am, can you hear me? I’m with the sheriff’s department. Is there anyone else in here? Can you tell me what…”

The woman reared up, “Ain’t but just th’ two us. That son of a bitch hit me ‘cause I let him sleep and didn’t have his breakfast hot when he woke up.” Snatching the towel from Jesse, she pressed it over her eye, and glared balefully around, mumbling, “Dammit, I just bought new dishes in New Mexico.”

Jesse asked, “Ma’am, do you have some identification? Is he your husband?”

The woman started trying to get up, and Jesse helped her to the couch. The woman reached in a purse sitting on the corner. Jesse watched her closely, and was relieved when she came out with a small wallet, handing over a license.

“Mrs. Wharton, is that your husband?” Jesse asked as she quickly wrote the information in her wheel book.

“T’aint married.” Wharton replied.

Jesse heard a yell, “You ain’t arresting me!” And a scuffle start outside. As she turned to the door, she took her attention off the woman sitting on the couch. Stepping to the door, she saw Hart had the situation under control and as she turned back, she sensed something coming at her. Ducking she heard the woman squall, “You ain’t arresting him!” as she tried a backhanded swing at Jesse with a frying pan half full of stale bacon grease.

Jesse jumped out of the way of the pan, yelling, “Stop it! If you don’t stop, I’ll have to arrest you!”

Wharton simply swung the pan again, and Jesse managed to duck out of the way but got splashed with more bacon grease, then tripped Wharton to the floor. Jesse hadn’t been in a fight since going through training and had forgotten how violent women could be. She finally got one arm pinned, got a cuff on one hand, and Wharton on her stomach, riding her like a bucking bronc.

“Give me your other hand,” Jesse gritted as she fought to maintain her position, trying to pinion the other now greasy arm and get a pain compliance hold. The woman continued to flail her free arm, and grunt unintelligibly as Jesse tried time after time to get a grip. Suddenly a boot stepped none too gently on Wharton’s arm, and Jesse was finally able to get a pain compliance grip on the fingers, bringing the slippery hand behind her back and getting the other cuff on.

Once she’d done that, she blew her hair out of her face and looked up to see Trooper Wilson, “Thanks Michelle!” This one kinda went rodeo on me.”

Trooper Wilson chuckled, “Fun isn’t it? You okay?”

Jesse climbed wearily to her feet, “I think so.” Rotating her shoulder she continued, “Nothing feels like its broken, but she almost got me with a frying pan, of all things.”

Hart jumped into the RV, “Jesse? You okay?” As he reached down and hauled Wharton to her feet. “Have you searched the rest of the RV?”

Jesse grumbled, “I’m fine, and no! She went all rodeo on me. If you’ll Mirandize her, I’ll finish doing that now. I’m pretty sure this is going to be an impound and we’ll have to get a search warrant.”

Hart frog marched the woman out of the RV as Jesse and Michelle Wilson finished searching the RV. There weren’t any more people in it, but they did find a cat hiding on top of the cupboard in the back bedroom, drug paraphernalia, and on more searching, six gallon bags of white crystalline substance hidden under the mattress. Jesse looked at Trooper Wilson as she held up one bag to the light, “Have you got a test kit handy? I don’t think they meant for us to find these.”

Wilson nodded, “Yep, got a kit in the car, but I’m betting that’s Meth. It doesn’t look like Coke or Heroin, looks like crystal Meth to me.” As Wilson turned to leave, she said, “I’ll get my camera and I’m guessing we’ll have to do an inventory, then tear this thing apart to see if anything else is hidden in here as soon as we get a warrant.”

Hart came in, “What’d y’all find?”

Jesse held up one of the bags, pointing to the others and Hart whistled, “Damn, that’s a load.” Waving a stack of papers, he continued, “Looks like the RV is registered to one of those RV rental places in Fullerton, California, wherever that is.”

“That’s just south of Los Angeles,” Jesse said, “So, are they delivering or picking up, or both?”

Opening the NARK kit, Wilson took out the meth ampoule, “I think they were delivering based on all the bags being identical. Coke and weed normally run east to west, but lately Meth and Heroin run west to east. I’m betting this is crystal meth. We can test one here, if it’s positive, the others can be tested back at the station.”  Opening the bag, an odor of Geraniums welled up as Wilson scooped a sample into the test bag and crushed the end of the ampoule. A dark purple, almost black color showed as soon as she cracked the ampoule.

Hart chuckled, “Winner, winner, chicken dinner! That stuff must be pretty good to light up that quickly.” Looking at Jesse he sniffed, “Looks and smells like you’ve been in a fight with a greased pig.”

Jesse looked down ruefully, “Yeah, glad I’ve got another uniform in my car. And a greased pig was easier, trust me! She might be older and fatter, but that damn grease made it harder than hell to get a grip on her!”

They heard a voice, “Where are y’all?”

Jesse and Hart both recognized the sheriff’s voice and chorused, “Back here, Sheriff.”

Sheriff Rodriquez stopped in the door and peered at the bags on the bedding, “What you got Michelle? Good bust?”

Wilson replied, “Oh yeah, Sheriff. I’m betting ten, maybe twelve pounds of quality crystal meth!” Waving the test bag at him, “Look at the color, it lit up in about two seconds, almost black. This stuff is pure uncut, and probably all from the same source.”

Hart chimed in, “Looks like they rented the RV in Fullerton, California, just outside LA and they’ve had it for six days. Be interesting to know where they’ve been in the last six days. LA is, at best, a three day trip from there to here.”

The sheriff nodded, “Y’all done an administrative inventory yet? Called for a tow?” He glanced at Jesse and sniffed, “Bacon grease?”

Jesse sighed, “No, no, and greased pig. The woman took a swing at me with a skillet full of grease, thankfully it wasn’t hot grease. It kinda went downhill until Michelle stepped in, literally, and I could get her cuffed.”

“What kind of skillet? Cast iron, or one of those new enamel ones?”

Jesse thought, “Uh, enamel I think.”

The sheriff said, “So felony three instead of felony one. Did you bag it for evidence?”

Jesse shook her head, “No, sir. Not yet anyway. I’ll do that right now.”

***

A half hour later, Sheriff Rodriquez and Sergeant Greenwood from DPS shook hands and turned over the crime scene to DPS and Ranger Clay Boone, along with the completed administrative inventory of the RV. The sheriff walked back to where Jesse and Hart were leaning on the side of the car saying, “Okay, got that one off our plate. With John on vacation, I don’t have anybody to do the investigation, and frankly I don’t want to deal with another damn set of druggies in the tanks. Why don’t y’all head on back to the office and Jesse, you can go on home…”

Jesse bristled, “Jose, all I want to do is get a quick shower, change uniforms, and get back out here. There’s still two hours left on the shift!”

Holding up his hands in self-defense, the sheriff replied, “Okay, okay! I was just going to give…”

“I don’t need coddling, Sheriff! I need to get back in the saddle, and getting back out here is the way I want to do it,” Jesse replied. Turning to Hart she said, “You ready to clear and head back? I’d really like to get this bacon grease off.”

Hart shrugged, “You’re driving. Let’s do it. Do you mind if I put my window down?”

Jesse rolled her eyes, “Fine. Just get in the car.”

***

Jesse stood in the locker room shower, sluicing the shampoo out of her hair and looking down at her hands, which were shaking. Stop it already! You came through that fine. One minor screw up, but you recovered. You didn’t die, and you didn’t shoot anybody. You’re going through an adrenalin dump. You’ve been here before. Time to get back out there!

Quickly drying off, she slipped into her spare uniform, moved everything from the shirt and pants to the uniform she was wearing, tossed the other one in a trash bag, and thought, I’ve Got to wash this as soon as I get home, otherwise, it’s going in the trash. And order new pants!

She grabbed a cup of coffee from the break room, dropped the trash bag in her car, and popped the trunk on two-fourteen, ensuring nothing was missing or moved. After gathering Hart up, she pulled back onto I-10 and headed east. “Okay Johnny, can we do a rehash of the domestic and what went wrong?”

[1] Field Training Officer

So, minor changes, based on the responses, and I think it ‘tightened’ the chapter up considerably.

Are we going down this political road???

1964 was one of the ugliest presidential contests ever seen to that point with the advent of TV ads…

It was Goldwater vs. Johnson…

And the dems pulled out ALL the stops with the negative ads.

This one is chillingly like some of the comments I’ve been hearing batted around in various circles concerning Trump (including on the Pub elite’s side).

Is a new ‘Daisy‘ ad coming???

 

TBT…

My maternal grandfather was a railroad engineer back in the late 1800s, early 1900s. He worked for a couple of different lines, eventually ending up with UP.

If I remember correctly, this was one of the trains he was the engineer on, sometime in the 1890s. Sadly I don’t know which line, but the back of the picture was labeled Abilene.

train grandpa curtis early 1900s

He was also an investigator for the rail line at one point. This is one of the wrecks he had to investigate somewhere out west…

These were taken with a little Kodak camera, type unknown. Apparently the film was developed and processed at Fox in San Antonio, TX

train wreck 1

Sadly, I don’t remember the story behind these pictures, but I don’t think it ended well for the engineer and fireman…

The only thing I remember about these is grandpa saying this was what happened when a boiler blew up!

Posted in TBT

Isn’t THIS just special…

There is an organization called the Entertainment Industries Council founded to influence the entertainment industry.  They ‘supposedly’ provide information and guidance on a variety of health and social issues are accurately depicted onscreen in feature films among other things…

Full article HERE from the Daily Caller.

More interesting is THIS link… for depictions of gun violence…

E.g. if you want to sell stuff in Hollyweird, this is the way you need to ‘write’ your story…

The following points for consideration were created as a resource for entertainment development and production. They are not intended to limit the creative process.

  • Attempt to highlight alternative resolutions to conflict rather than relying on gunplay as the only or automatic means of settling confrontations. Clashes can be resolved by other less lethal means, perhaps by characters using their wits and cunning to overcome opponents.
  • Consider highlighting the emotional consequences for the shooter, such as feelings of guilt, remorse, personal angst, and so on.
  • Consider incorporating such real-life scenarios as:
    • The shooter or possessor of a gun being accidently injured by it.
    • A gun accidentally misfiring while being loaded or unloaded by a criminal or other user.
    • A gun misfiring and injuring someone after being accidentally dropped.
  • Consider the story potential that may exist in a family filing suit against a gun manufacturer for injuries or death sustained by a defective firearm that misfired.
  • Consider reflecting the reality that homeowners often freeze up or tremble so badly when trying to use a gun in self-defense that they are unable to deploy it. Or show them as being too frozen in fear to even get the gun.
  • Where appropriate to the story, consider portraying a teenage girl threatening to break up with her boyfriend unless he gets rid of his gun – or a boy doing the same with a gun-owning girlfriend.
  • Consider depicting the reality that women are far more likely to be shot by husbands or lovers than by an intruder. Odds are that a gun in her home will be used against her rather than in her defense.

As the original article states, this is what Holder was pushing as far back as 1995 to ‘brainwash’ kids against guns…

Sigh… Why are they SO determined to take the ability to protect one’s self away from us? Do we really scare them that badly???

Third time’s a charm…

FINALLY have a complete kitchen again…

First it was the wrong oven (too big), then it was a bent up range hood, and finally today…

kitchen

Now to get the new backsplash in… Sigh…

It’s a never ending saga!

But at least I can now SEE what I’m cooking. Maybe that will help! 🙂

Heavy weather expected today, so I’ll probably be staying off the computer most of the day… Time to get some reading done!!!