OLD AIN’T WHAT IT USED TO BE Don’t be worried about your smartphone or TV spying on you. Your vacuum cleaner has been collecting dirt on you for years. If you can’t think of a word, simply say, “I forgot the English word for … Continue reading
Category Archives: net humor
All Puns Intended 1. Two antennas met on a roof … fell in love and got married. The ceremony wasn’t much … but the reception was excellent. 2. A jumper cable walks into a bar. The bartender says … “I’ll … Continue reading
UP This two-letter word in English has more meanings than any other two-letter word, and that word is ‘UP.’ It is listed in the dictionary as an [adv.], [prep.], [adj.], [n] or [v]. It’s easy to understand UP, meaning toward … Continue reading
To start the week! Aviator “wisdom” Definitions: Pilots: People who drive airplanes. Naval Aviators: Cold, steely eyed, weapons systems managers who kill bad people and break things. However, they can also be very charming and personable. The average Naval Aviator, despite sometimes having … Continue reading
Is not a language for the weak minded… We’ll begin with a box, and the plural is boxes, But the plural of ox becomes oxen, not oxes. One fowl is a goose, but two are called geese, Yet the plural … Continue reading
To start your week! Parents have learned: 1. Garbage bags do not make good parachutes. 2. A 3-year-old is louder than 200 adults in a crowded restaurant. 3. If you spray hairspray on dust bunnies and run over them with … Continue reading
To start your week! One Sunday, when counting the money in the weekly offering, the Pastor of a small church found a pink envelope containing $1,000. It happened again the next week! The following Sunday, he watched as the offering … Continue reading
To start your week! 1 – I’d kill for a Nobel Peace Prize. 2 – Borrow money from pessimists — they don’t expect it back. 3 – Half the people you know are below average. 4 – 99% of lawyers … Continue reading
Truly BAD jokes… I used to be addicted to the hokey pokey…but then I turned myself around. What’s the most terrifying word in nuclear physics? “Oops!” I’m terrified of elevators…so I’m going to start taking steps to avoid the elevator… I … Continue reading
For versions of humor… Ouch!!! We have the standard 6 ft. fence in the backyard, and a few months ago, I heard about burglaries increasing dramatically in the entire city. To make sure this never happened to me, I got … Continue reading