How about some humor…

Posted on by October 3, 2022

Truisms!

1.Today a man knocked on my door and asked for a small donation towards the local swimming pool, so I gave him a glass of water.

2. I changed my password to “incorrect” so whenever I forget it the computer will say, “Your password is incorrect.”

3. Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity.

4. I’m great at multi-tasking. I can waste time, be unproductive, and procrastinate all at once.

5. If you can smile when things go wrong, you have someone in mind to blame.

6. Doesn’t expecting the unexpected mean that the unexpected is actually expected?

7. Take my advice — I’m not using it.

8. Hospitality is the art of making guests feel like they’re at home when you wish they were.

9. Television may insult your intelligence, but nothing rubs it in like a computer.

10. I bought a vacuum cleaner six months ago and so far all it’s been doing is gathering dust.

11. Every time someone comes up with a foolproof solution, along comes a more-talented fool.

12. If you keep your feet firmly on the ground, you’ll have trouble putting on your pants.

13. A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing.

14. Ever stop to think and forget to start again?

15. When I married Ms. Right, I had no idea her first name was Always.

16. My wife got 8 out 10 on her driver’s test. The other two guys managed to jump out of her way.

17. There may be no excuse for laziness, but I’m still looking.

18. Women spend more time wondering what men are thinking than men spend thinking.

19. Give me ambiguity or give me something else.

20. He who laughs last thinks slowest.

21. Is it wrong that only one company makes the game Monopoly?

22. Women sometimes make fools of men, but most guys are the D-I-Y type.

23. I was going to give him a nasty look, but he already had one.

24. Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.

25. The grass may be greener on the other side but at least you don’t have to mow it.

If you think the last post was bad…

Posted on by October 2, 2022

This one will really trip you off line!!!

Three progressive Queens Councilmembers are co-sponsoring a bill that would permanently abolish the NYPD’s Gang Database as violent crime surges in the Big Apple, including gang related incidents.

According to the Astoria Post, one of the sponsors, Tiffany Caban, said “The gang database is nothing but a dragnet to surveil and criminalize Black and brown New Yorkers, especially youth.”

Full article, HERE from PM.

And if you read her issues paper, it’s even scarier…

  • Defund, and ultimately disband, the NYPD and replace it with a community-led public safety infrastructure
  • Fight to close Rikers Island before 2026 and halt the construction of the borough-based jails proposal
  • Create a citywide bail vouchers program to facilitate the release of incarcerated individuals
  • Remove police from schools, traffic enforcement, homeless outreach, and hospitals

Full link/issues paper HERE!

And she got elected on this!!!

Wow…

YGTBSM!!!

Posted on by October 1, 2022

This is… damned Yankees…

Members of a Vermont high school girls’ volleyball team have been barred from using their locker room after a transgender teammate allegedly made an unwelcome comment. The players then refused to change in front of the transgender player and are paying for it.

Full article, HERE on PJ Media.

This is so out there I really thought it was a Babylon Bee article when I first heard about it. But…it’s true…

So they are penalizing the entire team and allowing the ‘trans’ to use the entire girls bathroom for itself, while the girls have to take turns changing in a single bathroom.

And this seems to be if not ‘typical’, at least not unusual for the bunch on the east coast/northeast coast. The kids pay for the games being played by the adults to appease the wokies, rather than standing up to them.

Sigh…

Book promo…

Posted on by October 1, 2022

Cedar Sanderson has published the SECOND hunting anthology (based on the joking around on the live stream comments about us doing one- The Deer Shot Back: and Other Hunting Tales

As always, click on the cover for the Amazon link!

The blurb-

Come for the laughter, stay for the next generation’s induction into the ancient art of hunting for the table. Twenty tales of hunting, fishing, trapping, and wilderness adventures will remind you why what was once practiced for survival became a sport, and is coming back around as people remember why we respect the creatures that keep us alive. For one thing, it’s the pratfalls that come along with all the serious notions. You can’t help but laugh along with these stories of how it went wrong in the most hilarious of ways!

Next up is D.A. Brock with the next book in his Republic of Texas Navy series- The Lone Star, the Tricolor, and the Swastika

The blurb-

Autumn, 1939…

The war that the Western nations have long dreaded has erupted in Europe. After the conquest of western Poland by Germany, the war on land settles into the so-called ‘Phony War’.

But the war at sea is anything but phony. Especially when the French Government accuses the Republic of Texas of providing aid to Germany. The tension escalates, and Hitler fans the flames for his own nefarious purposes.

After a devastating sneak attack, Commodore Karl von Stahlberg is thrust into command of the Texas battle fleet. Can he defend Texas against the enemy’s onslaught, or will Texas be defeated?

Karl Gallagher has his fourth book in the Fall of the Censor series out- Captain Trader Helmsman Spy

The blurb-

Niko Landry needs to infiltrate the Censorate to find a weakness before it launches its next assault. The Censor bans maps of hyperspace, forcing freighters to find their way by word of mouth.

He and his crew will pretend to be ordinary traders while finding out all the secrets they can. Any mistake could leave them broke . . . or executed.

And Laura Montgomery has her fifth novel out in the Martha’s Sons series- His Terrible Stall

The blurb-

On a lost and stranded colony world, with his brother’s family at risk, Peter Dawe will do what he must to protect them

A lost starship’s settlers turn one valley on an alien planet into a terraformed replica of Earth. The rest of the planet offers only hardship and madness. Despite the oasis First Landing provides, the ship’s crew fled decades earlier with their fabricators, spacecraft, and knowledge when those controlling the valley threatened their freedoms.

The ship’s crew founded a separate colony on the southern plains. From there they spied on their former passengers, always fearful that the richer valley would come to take what they had. Even after a generation, the loathing persists.

A man in exile—

Peter Dawe faces an arid existence in a brother’s secret northern outpost. His work there has meaning and purpose, but when asked to journey to the southern settlement to help recover stolen weapons his brother needs, Peter has to defeat his own belief he shouldn’t expect too much from life.

A brother’s quest—

Determined to find the missing rifles, Peter works his way through supposed friends and allies to catch the real thieves. But can he overcome the prior generation’s ruthless plans to stop him when his own life hangs in the balance?

Cedar Sanderson also has a new ‘coloring book’ out- Fantasy Treehouse Art & Architecture

The blurb-

And our short stories don’t always make it through the slush pile, or the final cut for anthologies… So I give you a cheep little short story, a little over 9000 words- Country Boys (and Girls) Will Survive
The blurb-
Shady Rest Mobile Home Park wasn’t anything much… Small, old, and butted up against the Okefenokee swamp, with an ‘eclectic’ group of tenants, it was the target in a long time feud.
DK Thorne, a medically retired Marine, did his best to keep the place afloat and the tenants and county happy, until the local witch said ‘things’ were coming… 
And they did, but country boys and girls know how to survive.
It is live now, for the munificent sum of $.99. 🙂

Huh, whoda thunk it…

Posted on by September 28, 2022

The FBI apparently is picking up side gigs to get more money… And apparently lied on the search warrant application, ‘forgetting’ to mention that the plan was to confiscate most of the contents of the safe deposit boxes as ‘criminal proceeds’.

The privacy invasion was vast when FBI agents drilled and pried their way into 1,400 safe-deposit boxes at the U.S. Private Vaults store in Beverly Hills.

They rummaged through personal belongings of a jazz saxophone player, an interior designer, a retired doctor, a flooring contractor, two Century City lawyers and hundreds of others.

Full article, HERE from, of all places, the LA Times.

$86 million in cash along with gold, silver, rare coins, gem-studded jewelry, and Rolex and Cartier watches. At least that is what they ‘admitted’ to taking…

One can’t help but wonder what ‘else’ got taken that never got accounted for?

Just stop already…

Posted on by September 28, 2022

NOW is NOT the time to play politics over Florida!

The people of Florida deserve better! This is America! For the administration, et al, to pre-blame DeSantis for what is happening, is both childish and outright stupid…

I have a number of friends down in various parts of Florida, including Tampa/St. Pete, Orlando, and up around Jacksonville/St. Augustine. Some have evacuated (not stupid, and listened to the state folks), leaving houses as well prepared as they could to survive the damages.

Others, further up state are riding it out, but all have prepared as well as they can (most have adequate storage, generators, window/door covers, etc. And you know it’s going to be bad when the Waffle Houses close… 12-19 inches of rain are predicted in some spots, including Orlando, and Florida has been wet for the last week, so there isn’t any place for all that rain to go.

The president called Mayor Jane Castor (D) of Tampa, Mayor Ken Welch (D) of St. Petersburg, and Mayor Frank Hibbard (I) of Clearwater BEFORE he ever called Gov DeSantis! Interesting set of ‘priorities’ isn’t it???

From FEMA Director Criswell presser-

Q    Okay.  And just a curiosity: I know we’ve asked before; you spoke to several mayors down there.  One of the mayors said that one of the primary concerns was complacency.  I’m curious — the President spoke to big leaders.  First question to you is about complacency.  The second is, you’ve spoken to the governor of the state; why hasn’t the President yet?  Or is there a scheduled call for the two men to speak, obviously, as they’re the preeminent leaders of the country and of that state?

ADMINISTRATOR CRISWELL:  I do have concerns about complacency.  We’re talking about impacts in a part of Florida that hasn’t seen a major direct impact in nearly 100 years.  There’s also parts of Florida where there’s a lot of new residents that have never experienced this type of threat.

So my message to them is still: Take this very seriously.  Listen to your local officials.  And those Floridians that have been through this before, help your neighbors that may have not had to go through this.  Heeding the advice of your local officials is the most important.

And as far as the conversation, the President directed me to contact the governor early on, before we even did the declaration; I did that.  My regional administrator is with the governor right now, making sure that we’re understanding what the needs are.  And our focus is on the current life safety needs that need to be met.

Full transcript HERE from C-SPAN.

And the hysterical coverage by the MSM, with the usual idjits standing out in ‘100mph’ winds, to show how ‘bad’ the weather is. Really? Any idiot can look at the camera video, listen to the wind whistling, and tell that the wind is blowing like hell, and see the storm surge is covering houses!

I’m just waiting for one of the weather idjits to get decapitated on air by a sign, piece of tin, or whatever… sigh

On the plus side, over 30,000 linemen, along with trucks, power poles, lines, etc. are staged and waiting for the winds to drop below 35mph to go in and start rebuilding the infrastructure.

So, say a prayer for them, and those further north as this storm will ‘probably’ curl back and hit Georgia, South Carolina, and maybe North Carolina before it goes away.

Score!!!

Posted on by September 27, 2022

The Double Asteroid Redirection Test (DART) impactor hit its target, the space rock Dimorphos, at 7:14 pm Eastern Time (2314 GMT), 10 months after blasting off from California on its pioneering mission.

Full article, HERE from Science Alert!

I don’t care who you are, you have to be impressed with the fact that DART worked! 7 million miles later, a center mass hit on a 530 foot asteroid is considerably less than one minute of angle (by at least probably five or six decimal points)… And it was on time and on the money!!!

The next question will be did it actually give enough oomph to change the orbit? I don’t think we’re going to have that answer for a while, but we can truly say we are living in the future!!!

Hollywood has talked about it, but now it has actually been done! Kudos to the scientists and engineers that pulled this off!

Is the EU melting down???

Posted on by September 26, 2022

It sure seems like it! Between the Germans getting stupid with the green agenda and the EU forcing countries to allow refugees in, Russia cutting off the gas pipeline just before winter, Belgium shutting down a nuclear reactor next week, Holland and others trying to ban farms and cattle operations, the Swedes going for a hard right leaning government, and the Italians doing the same thing, all of this after Brexit, this could literally be the ‘winter of discontent”. Italy may now implement a no illegals policy (time will tell).

Lack of food, no or limited heating (especially in those areas full of immigrants in those no go zones who like being warm), and general discontent over what is happening in Ukraine and other former Soviet ‘client states’, has everybody on edge.

Hungary and Poland have been the holdouts, with Hungary’s border secure, and no illegal migration (Gee, fences really DO work). And Orban, who was reelected,  promotes Christianity and has implemented family-friendly policies. Poland has been trying to reform their judicial system for a couple of years, and finally have a ‘plan’ to get the EU to finally give them the money the EU has been holding. Of note, this is nothing new, having been going on since the early 1990s after Poland became ‘free’.

Remember, France had a scare earlier with the Macron/Le Pen election, with Le Pen actually pressing Macron much harder than in 2017! That scared the hell out of France and the EU, because Le Pen was truly hard right.

And England is feeling its way as King Charles III takes the helm, and people wonder which direction THEY are going to go. Charles was notoriously FOR a green agenda, but the question is, will he actually step back now that he is king. Some of the Commonwealth are discussing ‘breaking away’ from England, etc…

And we have a dysfunctional administration in charge, bumbling from error to error… With our own set of problems, many driven by political partisanship, so there is no ‘steady hand’ at the helm.

In summary, I think all we can do is sit back, stock up on things we need, and hold our breath that things don’t blow sky high on us…

Your thoughts?

Old school humor…

Posted on by September 25, 2022

You may remember the old Jewish Catskill Comics of Vaudeville days:

Shecky Greene, Red Buttons, Totie Fields, Joey Bishop, Milton Berle, Jan Murray, Danny Kaye, Henny Youngman, Buddy Hackett, Sid Caesar, Groucho Marx, Jackie Mason, Woody Allen, Lenny Bruce, George Burns, Allan Sherman, Jerry Lewis, Carl Reiner, Shelley Berman, Gene Wilder, George Jessel, Alan King, Mel Brooks, Phil Silvers, Jack Carter, Rodney Dangerfield, Don Rickles, Jack Benny, and so many others. 

Amazingly, there was not one single swear word in their comedy. 

Here are examples: 

* I just got back from a pleasure trip. I took my mother-in-law to the airport. 

* I’ve been in love with the same woman for 49 years! If my wife ever finds out, she’ll kill me! 

* What are three words a woman never wants to hear when she’s making love? ~ “Honey, I’m home!” 

* Someone stole all my credit cards, but I won’t be reporting it. The thief spends less than my wife did. 

* We always hold hands. If I let go, she shops. 

* My wife and I went back to the hotel where we spent our wedding night. Only this time I stayed in the bathroom and cried. 

* My wife and I went to a hotel where we got a waterbed. My wife called it the Dead Sea. 

* She was at the beauty shop for two hours. That was only for the estimate. She got a mudpack and looked great for two days. Then the mud fell off. 

* The Doctor gave a man six months to live. The man couldn’t pay his bill, so the doctor gave him another six months. 

* The Doctor called Mrs. Cohen saying, “Mrs. Cohen, your check came back.” Mrs. Cohen answered, “So did my arthritis!” 

* Doctor: “You’ll live to be 60!” Patient: “I am 60!” Doctor: “See! What did I tell you?” 

* Patient: “I have a ringing in my ears.” Doctor: “Don’t answer it!” 

* A drunk was in front of a judge. The judge says, “You’ve been brought here for drinking.” The drunk says “Okay, let’s get started.” 

* Why do Jewish divorces cost so much? They’re worth it. 

* The Harvard School of Medicine did a study of why Jewish women like Chinese food so much. The study revealed that this is due to the fact that Won Ton spelled backward is Not Now. 

*There is a big controversy on the Jewish view of when life begins. In Jewish tradition, the foetus is not considered viable until it graduates from medical school. 

Q: Why don’t Jewish mothers drink? ~ A: Alcohol interferes with their suffering. 

Q: Why do Jewish mothers make great parole officers? ~ A: They never let anyone finish a sentence! 

A man called his mother in Florida, “Mom, how are you?” “Not too good,” said the mother. “I’ve been very weak. “The son said, “Why are you so weak?” She said, “Because I haven’t eaten in 38 days. “The son said, “That’s terrible. Why haven’t you eaten in 38 days?” The mother answered, “Because I didn’t want my mouth to be filled with food if you should call.” 

A Jewish boy comes home from school and tells his mother he has a part in the play. She asks, “What part is it?” The boy says, “I play the part of the Jewish husband.” The mother scowls and says, “Go back and tell the teacher you want a speaking part.” 

Q: How many Jewish mothers does it take to change a light bulb? ~ A: (Sigh) “Don’t bother. I’ll sit in the dark. I don’t want to be a nuisance to anybody.” 

Did you hear about the bum who walked up to a Jewish mother on the street and said, “Lady, I haven’t eaten in three days.” ~ “Force yourself,” she replied. 

Q: What’s the difference between a Rottweiler and a Jewish mother? ~ A: Eventually, the Rottweiler lets go. 

Interesting look at lithium batteries vs. nuclear power…

Posted on by September 24, 2022

From Substack-

For decades, critics of nuclear power plants have pointed to their unique danger. When there is a loss of water coolant for the reactor cores, plant operators can lose control, leaving them to melt, and potentially spew toxic particulate matter into the environment. Nuclear accidents are unique in requiring people to “shelter-in-place,” and close windows and vents, to avoid breathing radiant particulate matter. And nuclear accidents can unfold in unpredictable and mysterious ways, such as by creating hydrogen gas explosions, like the kinds that occurred during the Fukushima nuclear accident in 2011.

Full article, HERE from Michael Shellenberger

Nuclear has always been the left’s boogeyman, going back to the nuclear stalemate and the paranoia over nuclear power plants ‘melting down’…

Mr. Shellenberger does a good job of pointing out the fallacies on both sides, and the fact that lithium batteries are actually more dangerous. We had them on our birds, and had to be able to get rid of them ‘quickly’ if they started outgassing. And these were little batteries!

Yet in Belgium, in the midst of a true energy crisis, they are shutting down at least one, if not two nuclear reactors because… Government regulations… HERE.

Sigh… what happened to common sense???